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Thread: A little "OC" humor

  1. #1
    Regular Member Mark 1911's Avatar
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    May 2012
    Munster, IN

    A little "OC" humor

    Here's one that may appeal to the OC crowd:

    An old prospector shuffled into the town of El Indio, Texas leading a tired old mule.

    The old man headed straight for the only saloon in town, to clear his parched throat.

    He walked up to the saloon and tied his old mule to the hitch rail.

    As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.

    The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, "Hey old man, can you dance?"

    The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No son, I don't dance... never really wanted to"

    A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, "Well, you old fool, you're gonna dance now!" and started shooting at the old man's feet.

    The old prospector, not wanting to get a toe blown off, started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet.

    Everybody standing around was laughing..

    When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.

    The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled 12 gauge shotgun and cocked both hammers.

    The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air. The crowd stopped laughing immediately.

    The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly.

    The silence was deafening. The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin 12gauge barrels.

    The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's hands, as he quietly said;

    "Son, have you ever kissed a mule's a$$?"

    The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No sir... but.... I've always wanted to"

    There are a few lessons for all of us here:
    *Don't be arrogant.
    *Don't waste ammunition.
    *Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
    *Always make sure you know who is in control...
    *And finally, Don't screw around with old folks; they didn't get old by being stupid....

    I just love a story with a happy ending, don't you?
    Last edited by Mark 1911; 05-30-2012 at 12:53 PM.

  2. #2
    Regular Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Since you mentioned whiskey...

    Be wary of strong drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors... and miss. -Heinlein.
    Don't believe any facts that I say! This is the internet and it is filled with lies and untruth. I invite you to look up for yourself the basic facts that my arguments might be based upon. This way we can have a discussion where logic and hints on where to find information are what is brought to the forum and people look up and verify facts for themselves.

  3. #3
    Regular Member OC for ME's Avatar
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    Jan 2010
    White Oak Plantation
    Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. - Mark Twain
    Words to live by.
    "I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending too much liberty than to those attending too small a degree of it." - Thomas Jefferson.

    "Better that ten guilty persons escape, than that one innocent suffer" - English jurist William Blackstone.
    It is AFAIK original to me. Compromise is failure on the installment plan, particularly when dealing with so intractable an opponent as ignorance. - Nightmare

  4. #4
    Regular Member SFCRetired's Avatar
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    Oct 2008
    Montgomery, Alabama, USA
    Don't know who said it, but, "Drink water? Egad, do you know what fish do in that stuff?!!"

  5. #5
    Regular Member
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    Sep 2008
    Quote Originally Posted by SFCRetired View Post
    Don't know who said it, but, "Drink water? Egad, do you know what fish do in that stuff?!!"
    The same water the is used to make the booze that so many people drink. Face it, no matter what you drink you are drinking fish poop.

  6. #6
    Regular Member William Fisher's Avatar
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    Jan 2011
    Oxford, Ohio
    That was a good one. LOL

  7. #7
    Regular Member Redbaron007's Avatar
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    Sep 2011
    SW MO
    Quote Originally Posted by jeeper1 View Post
    The same water the is used to make the booze that so many people drink. Face it, no matter what you drink you are drinking fish poop.

    You are correct!!

    However, the big deal is how well they clean the fish poop in the water!!
    "I can live for two weeks on a good compliment."
    ~Mark Twain

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