Carrying while mothering

rosesandbrambles · Nov 3, 2012

I must admit, I was a little nervous posting or asking anything, but you all are so nice. Thank you to everyone who posted, the warm welcomes, the websites for more info, the tips...

I appreciate your kindness and honesty.

acfreddie · Nov 3, 2012

rosesandbrambles said:
Feeling like everyone would stare at me? I wear jeans and a t-shirt, rather fitted ones at that. It would be obvious, or at least I think it would be.

Do you all carry to the grocery store, Walmart, anywhere else you go? Have you ever had problems?

We also applaud your decision.

My wife (and I) OC at all of the places you mentioned, most of the time they don't notice (even though she is about 4'8", wears similar type of clothes and carries a near full size 9mm) but during the times they do, they mostly look at it to make sure what they are seeing then carry on with what they were doing before noticing. A select few have said positive things (nice gun, etc) she has yet to have encountered any negative comments being expressed.

Shoobee · Nov 3, 2012

It only gets nasty when you talk about politics or religion. Just like anyplace else.

TFred · Nov 3, 2012

PistolPackingMomma said:
What does the nature of Mrs. Hain's death have to do with "open carrying while mothering"?

Nothing whatsoever, if you choose to keep a small focus. However, it is difficult to start the story about Meleanie Hain without finishing it. She became famous for her courage and her stance against the "good old boy network" in her home town. I would assume that a few who read about her here would search out some of the media reports to read for themselves, but unfortunately, all the top search engine returns now list the much sadder stories of the criminal attack that took her life. I wouldn't want someone to learn of her here and then be surprised to find out on their own what happened to her later.

And also just as I said in my first post... those of us who "knew" her to whatever extent, whether in person, or just via the distance of e-mail or forum communication, can't separate our pride in knowing a real OC hero from our sense of loss at her death.

TFred

robert1970 · Nov 3, 2012

rosesandbrambles said:
Feeling like everyone would stare at me? I wear jeans and a t-shirt, rather fitted ones at that. It would be obvious, or at least I think it would be.

Do you all carry to the grocery store, Walmart, anywhere else you go? Have you ever had problems?

I open carry every where I go except for work,so far I havent had eny proplems at all.

Grapeshot · Nov 4, 2012

TFred said:
Nothing whatsoever, if you choose to keep a small focus. However, it is difficult to start the story about Meleanie Hain without finishing it. She became famous for her courage and her stance against the "good old boy network" in her home town. I would assume that a few who read about her here would search out some of the media reports to read for themselves, but unfortunately, all the top search engine returns now list the much sadder stories of the criminal attack that took her life. I wouldn't want someone to learn of her here and then be surprised to find out on their own what happened to her later.

And also just as I said in my first post... those of us who "knew" her to whatever extent, whether in person, or just via the distance of e-mail or forum communication, can't separate our pride in knowing a real OC hero from our sense of loss at her death.

TFred

DoubleTap and I both knew Meleanie - she was the real deal. Was going to post a picture of the two of them in happier times, but it is on my home PC and I'm not there. If I can remember, I dig it out after the week-end.

ClumsyCandy · Nov 4, 2012

robert1970 said:
I open carry every where I go except for work,so far I havent had eny proplems at all.

Yes but you are also a dude. Seriously, I get noticed when I OC (PeterNap I give you permission to post my butt) because of my size. I'm 5' 9" and weigh, well, lets just say I'm "slender" to use Grapes words. : ) I've been with guys, we're both OCing, and I'm the one they see, and unless I point it out, they never notice that he is carrying. That being said.

You won't know until you try. Some of the individuals on here don't believe in concealing. To me, there is a time and a place for everything. They'll argue concealed is harder to get to, etc. etc. From my point of view, having carried while being with a child (who was not my own), sometimes, it's just easier to have it concealed. I had an incident with Barnes and Noble (the search function here is VERY good, however, I'm sure one of the old guys with more time and two working hands could find it for you) when I was open carrying. Again, I mostly conceal now but I do attract attention when I OC. My husband prefers to conceal because he doesn't want the attention. Luckily, he's a leftie, I'm a rightie (when it works) so we are covered on both sides and dont risk hitting each other when we draw. I think many of the gentlemen here, while trying to help, truly can never understand from a woman's perspective. It is different for us, and whereas you may catch some flak for it, often times, women are still stuck in HS and will judge another woman for having a firearm. I choose not to be a victim. I can't run. I can't fight. Without my trusty sidearm, I feel like I don't stand a chance in a volatile situation.

Short Version: Do what feels comfortable while continuing to protect yourself, your family and those around you. Being able to shoot is great, however, you have to mentally be prepared to shoot as well. Conceal or Open, do what feels right to you at the time.

And as always, carry on.

rosesandbrambles · Nov 4, 2012

ClumsyCandy said:
Yes but you are also a dude. Seriously, I get noticed when I OC (PeterNap I give you permission to post my butt) because of my size. I'm 5' 9" and weigh, well, lets just say I'm "slender" to use Grapes words. : ) I've been with guys, we're both OCing, and I'm the one they see, and unless I point it out, they never notice that he is carrying. That being said.

You won't know until you try. Some of the individuals on here don't believe in concealing. To me, there is a time and a place for everything. They'll argue concealed is harder to get to, etc. etc. From my point of view, having carried while being with a child (who was not my own), sometimes, it's just easier to have it concealed. I had an incident with Barnes and Noble (the search function here is VERY good, however, I'm sure one of the old guys with more time and two working hands could find it for you) when I was open carrying. Again, I mostly conceal now but I do attract attention when I OC. My husband prefers to conceal because he doesn't want the attention. Luckily, he's a leftie, I'm a rightie (when it works) so we are covered on both sides and dont risk hitting each other when we draw. I think many of the gentlemen here, while trying to help, truly can never understand from a woman's perspective. It is different for us, and whereas you may catch some flak for it, often times, women are still stuck in HS and will judge another woman for having a firearm. I choose not to be a victim. I can't run. I can't fight. Without my trusty sidearm, I feel like I don't stand a chance in a volatile situation.

Short Version: Do what feels comfortable while continuing to protect yourself, your family and those around you. Being able to shoot is great, however, you have to mentally be prepared to shoot as well. Conceal or Open, do what feels right to you at the time.

And as always, carry on.

A couple of responses to what you wrote and what everyone else has:

-One of the reasons I want to carry, but far from the only one, is a violent and armed ex spouse

-One of the reasons concealed may be better is my children not reporting back to him on me, he has weapons too, but likes to spin everything he can. On the flip side, time and money are in very short supply for me, so taking a class for the permit would be very difficult. Have saved for a firearm, but getting babysitters and actually going shooting? Something I will have to wait and work toward. Yes I've shot before, but it's been 8 years, and while I would like to fire whatever weapon I choose before committing to it, I am going to have to settle for doing as much research as I can and practicing with snap caps in my home after the children fall asleep.

Tess · Nov 4, 2012

rosesandbrambles said:
A couple of responses to what you wrote and what everyone else has:

-One of the reasons I want to carry, but far from the only one, is a violent and armed ex spouse

-One of the reasons concealed may be better is my children not reporting back to him on me, he has weapons too, but likes to spin everything he can. On the flip side, time and money are in very short supply for me, so taking a class for the permit would be very difficult. Have saved for a firearm, but getting babysitters and actually going shooting? Something I will have to wait and work toward. Yes I've shot before, but it's been 8 years, and while I would like to fire whatever weapon I choose before committing to it, I am going to have to settle for doing as much research as I can and practicing with snap caps in my home after the children fall asleep.

I don't recommend the on-line firearms class for those who have not yet had experience and training with their firearm, but you say you have. So you should know there is an on-line course that meets the requirements for the Virginia CHP. It is significantly less expensive than in-person courses. That said, when you have the opportunity for instructor-led training, TAKE IT. There is no such thing as too much good training.

As pistolpackingmama said, often one is not noticed, even while pregnant. When I first met Harper1227, she was pregnant and open-carrying. It increased my respect for her. She and others have also been profiled in magazines (though I can't find the links, one of the threads about the stories is here: http://forum.opencarry.org/forums/s...of-Open-Carry-in-and-around-Northern-Virginia. )

I've been open carrying in Northern Virginia (though much further east than you) for almost 10 years, with only one negative encounter. While I'm closer to grandmother age than mother, I often have in tow my adult special-needs son, and I can point to him as another reason for me to carry.

So welcome. Strap that gun to your side and be proud that you're showing the world you're neither weak nor unprotected. (Bad guys prey on the weak and unprotected).

And mentally prepare yourself for encounters that might be unique to you (i.e. armed ex). At least play in your mind with scenarios that COULD come up, and prepare not only for how you would handle it but for what your children would need to know. I won't say any more on that subject because I'm simply not even an amateur there, much less expert.

peter nap · Nov 4, 2012

Shoobee said:
It only gets nasty when you talk about politics or religion. Just like anyplace else.

Or the best rifle for Deer Hunting or if plastic guns are better than real ones or .........:lol:

peter nap · Nov 4, 2012

Tess said:
I don't recommend the on-line firearms class for those who have not yet had experience and training with their firearm, but you say you have. So you should know there is an on-line course that meets the requirements for the Virginia CHP. It is significantly less expensive than in-person courses. That said, when you have the opportunity for instructor-led training, TAKE IT. There is no such thing as too much good training.

As pistolpackingmama said, often one is not noticed, even while pregnant. When I first met Harper1227, she was pregnant and open-carrying. It increased my respect for her. She and others have also been profiled in magazines (though I can't find the links, one of the threads about the stories is here: http://forum.opencarry.org/forums/s...of-Open-Carry-in-and-around-Northern-Virginia. )

I've been open carrying in Northern Virginia (though much further east than you) for almost 10 years, with only one negative encounter. While I'm closer to grandmother age than mother, I often have in tow my adult special-needs son, and I can point to him as another reason for me to carry.

So welcome. Strap that gun to your side and be proud that you're showing the world you're neither weak nor unprotected. (Bad guys prey on the weak and unprotected).

And mentally prepare yourself for encounters that might be unique to you (i.e. armed ex). At least play in your mind with scenarios that COULD come up, and prepare not only for how you would handle it but for what your children would need to know. I won't say any more on that subject because I'm simply not even an amateur there, much less expert.

I agree Tess but assuming she can handle a gun and money is short, an online hunter safety course is free I think and qualifies her for a CHP.

Wolf_shadow · Nov 4, 2012

peter nap said:
I agree Tess but assuming she can handle a gun and money is short, an online hunter safety course is free I think and qualifies her for a CHP.

+1

Tess · Nov 4, 2012

peter nap said:
I agree Tess but assuming she can handle a gun and money is short, an online hunter safety course is free I think and qualifies her for a CHP.

Good point; I hadn't thought of that. I don't hunt, so tend to forget that route.

peter nap · Nov 4, 2012

Tess said:
Good point; I hadn't thought of that. I don't hunt, so tend to forget that route.

It's a big secret but I do hunt a little:uhoh::lol:

Esanders2008 · Nov 4, 2012

rosesandbrambles said:
A couple of responses to what you wrote and what everyone else has:

-One of the reasons I want to carry, but far from the only one, is a violent and armed ex spouse

-One of the reasons concealed may be better is my children not reporting back to him on me, he has weapons too, but likes to spin everything he can. On the flip side, time and money are in very short supply for me, so taking a class for the permit would be very difficult. Have saved for a firearm, but getting babysitters and actually going shooting? Something I will have to wait and work toward. Yes I've shot before, but it's been 8 years, and while I would like to fire whatever weapon I choose before committing to it, I am going to have to settle for doing as much research as I can and practicing with snap caps in my home after the children fall asleep.

Forgive me if it is none of my business, but has your ex ever been violent toward YOU? If that is the case, then perhaps a protective order may offer you a small amount of comfort. This would (hopefully, as I know sometimes people do break the law anyway) disarm him while the order is in effect.

rosesandbrambles · Nov 4, 2012

Esanders2008 said:
Forgive me if it is none of my business, but has your ex ever been violent toward YOU? If that is the case, then perhaps a protective order may offer you a small amount of comfort. This would (hopefully, as I know sometimes people do break the law anyway) disarm him while the order is in effect.

I got out. Had I told anyone about it while it was ongoing, I could have, but now that I am out of the relationship, I can't file for a protective order because there is nothing current. I am glad that he has stayed away, albeit on the stern advice of his lawyer, and I don't think he is stupid enough to try anything now, especially because I know the law, who to call, what to do etc., and then I did not. Besides, a gun is not the only way one can hurt someone else.

Marco · Nov 4, 2012

peter nap said:
I agree Tess but assuming she can handle a gun and money is short, an online hunter safety course is free I think and qualifies her for a CHP.

1+
on the hunter safety course or if she or anyone wants to take a good class that happens to be free:

Free basic handgun course..

Greene County Sheriff’s Office offers a free handgun safety course every other month as long as there is a continued interest.

The classes are offered to those 13 and older, and teach safe handling, usage, shooting fundamentals, proper selection, laws and the concealed permit process.

Students receive a certified certificate of completion, which may be used to apply for the Virginia concealed handgun permit through the Circuit Court. Applicants for a concealed handgun permit must be at least 21 years old, undergo a background check and be approved by the Commonwealth’s Attorney and Circuit Judge.

For more information contact Steve Keene at (434) 566-8774
skeene@embarqmail.com

i have no dog in this fight

peter nap · Nov 4, 2012

Marco said:
1+
on the hunter safety course or if she or anyone wants to take a good class that happens to be free:

i have no dog in this fight

I had forgotten about that Marco....excellent idea!

Grapeshot · Nov 4, 2012

peter nap said:
I had forgotten about that Marco....excellent idea!

Think it fantastic that they will admit those 13 yo and up.

Free basic handgun course..

Click to expand...

Greene County Sheriff’s Office offers a free handgun safety course every other month as long as there is a continued interest.

The classes are offered to those 13 and older, and teach safe handling, usage, shooting fundamentals, proper selection, laws and the concealed permit process.

Geoffrey Griffith · Nov 5, 2012

rosesandbrambles said:
Feeling like everyone would stare at me? I wear jeans and a t-shirt, rather fitted ones at that. It would be obvious, or at least I think it would be.

Do you all carry to the grocery store, Walmart, anywhere else you go? Have you ever had problems?

Walmart, Target, Giant, Whole foods, Trader Joe's, Home Depot, 7-11, Hair salon. Everywhere I go and with both of my boys ages 11 and 5. Never had a real issue. You get a few looks and some questions some in favor some against just know your rights and the reasons you believe open carry is right for you. If you need starter ideas for rebuttals this site is full of encounters to help you prepare.

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