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What To Buy The Wifey

GodGunsnGuts

Regular Member
Joined
Jun 16, 2006
Messages
14
Location
Buckroe Beach, Hampton, , USA
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Hey Now...just thought one of you guys might be able to share a suggestion on what kind of gun to buy for the wife. She's just getting over her "shyness" phase of OC'ing and I thing she's ready for her own. I was letting her pack my AMT 45 BACKUP but she complained of it's recoil hurting her wrist and all. I must admit, it does tend to snap the wrist if your not gripping it tight. I was thinking of a .380, but then I just don't think it has the necessary "stopping power" that it should. It has to be "pretty" and un-obtrusive, but powerful.

3G's
 

ProguninTN

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May 26, 2006
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416
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, Tennessee, USA
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Are you set on action type? If you want a semi-auto, I'd suggest stepping down to a .40 or 9mm parabellum. You did suggest 9mm kurz aka .380, but since you said you were worried about stopping power, maybe you should try the parabellum round. If you are willing to consider a revolver, you could try something in .357 Magnum. A .357 Magnum can accommodate the Magnum round or the .38 Special round. Once again, if you are worried about power, you could load .38 + P ammunition. I may add that recently, I completed a co-ed training class where men and women were shooting everything from .38 to .45. So, I guess it depends on the person. I hope this gives you some ideas.

ProguninTN
 

cs9c1

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Jun 17, 2006
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548
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Mechanicsville, Virginia, USA
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My wife has the XD 9 compensated on Lay Away. The reason we chose it: Mid size caliber, very little recoil, high quality all in a semi compact size. She can CC it in her purse with out too much weight and OC comfortably.
 

pourshot

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Jul 10, 2006
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Stafford, Virginia, USA
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WARNING! This is a canned answer on how to select a handgun, but it really might help.... (just replay "you" with "she" :))



Working on the backside of a counter at a gun store I am constantly being asked “What is the best handgun for self defense?” or “What gun should I buy for concealed/open carry?”



After a bit of thought I have come to the following simplifications…



When you are looking for a handgun there are only three things you need to consider:



Form, Fit and Function



Form – Do you want a revolver or a semi-automatic.



Revolver – Low capacity (fewer shots before you need to reload), Low maintenance (fewer parts to break and easier to clean), High reliability (will go bang when you need it). If you pull the trigger on a revolver and it does not go bang, you just pull the trigger again. If you pull the trigger on a semi-auto and it does not go bang you have some work to do to put the gun back in an operational state. Some easy, some not, but all take time and you might not have the time available to you at that particular moment



I used to fix peoples PCs at work and I ran into two mentalities. The first was “What did I do to break it? What did you do to fix it? Can you make it bigger? Better? Faster? Stronger? Where is my next software upgrade? Where is my next hardware upgrade?” and so on…. The other mentality was “I don’t care. Just fix it. I need it to do my job so make it do what I need it to do. Don’t explain it to me. I do not care and would not understand anyway. Just make it work and don’t bother me with the details.”



What does this have to do with handgun selection? Well those who have the “bigger better” mentality tend to be males leaning toward a semi-auto. Those who have the “just make it work” mentality tend to be females leaning toward revolvers, but this is true only about 51% of the time. Just a bit more than half the time and it gives a place to start.



However, if you are a male that likes revolvers or a female that likes semi-autos don’t think yourself odd. You are in the minority, but not by much.



Fit – It has to fit in your hand. It should feel good to hold onto almost as if the grip of the gun was molded just for you. If it does not, put it back. Buying it will not make it feel any better. How many things have you bought in your life that you thought you could use and when you get them home you set them down and never pick them up again because they really don’t ‘fit’ you. Yet you have your coffee cup, your scissors, your letter opener, your stapler, your chair, your knife, your tools, your pen, your pencil, your car, your room, all because they ‘fit’ you and all because they fit your life and / or lifestyle. They all feel natural when you use them. They all ‘fit.’



The other main one is sights. If you can point the gun and have the sights pretty close to being on target then it is probably a good gun for you or at the least deserves some consideration. On the other hand, if 5 minutes after you picked it up you are still looking for the sites and thinking “well, I know they were on the gun when I saw it on display” then it probably should not deserve any further consideration.



It needs to fit your budget. You need a gun that you can not only afford, but can also afford to shoot. If either the gun or the ammunition for regular practice, typically a monthly trip to the local range, is outside of your budget it is not the gun for you.



It needs to fit your wardrobe. If you are going to use it for a carry gun, concealed or open, you need to be able to find a usable holster that is consistent with your manner of dress and affords you the most comfortable way to transport what may be a very heavy object while maintaining a good level of accessibility. After all, getting to it is almost as important as being able to use it. Don’t forget to take the long term weight in to consideration. Sometimes a good gun at 7AM can be a boat anchor at 7PM. Multiple holsters for different modes of dress is also an option. Owning an array of guns is an option as well, but since we are talking budget here I will not go down that rabbit trail.



It has to fit your lifestyle. If this is a first gun purchase it is not just a purchase, it is a lifestyle change. How are you going to store it? Where are you going to store it? Who’s going to have access to it? When are they going to have access to it? Why are they going to have access to it? Are you going to store it loaded? Are you going to store it unloaded? If you store it unloaded where are you going to put the ammunition in relation to the gun? “Oh look. Uncle Joe is coming for a visit!” And everybody knows about Uncle Joe. So now you have to do something different with the gun. “Oh look. Little Billy is coming to play with little Suzy.” What concerns does little Billy bring up? You know how you have taught little Suzy, but little Billy is an unknown. Is this cause for concern? These thoughts can greatly impact your ideas on storage and storage can greatly affect your ability to obtain and use the gun. A gun in the safe takes a lot longer to get to than a gun on your hip, but having a gun on your hip may not always be an option.



And finally…



Function – You want as much ‘flash’ and ‘bang’ as you can comfortably handle, but not so much that it intimidates you. If every time you squeeze the trigger it takes you a couple of seconds to get back on target it may be too much gun for you. A couple of seconds to get back on target after the first shot can easily be more time than you have. Considering a man can easily move 7 to 10 yards (an approximate distance of two car lengths) in about the same amount of time.



If the ‘flash’ and ‘bang’ is below what you can handle comfortably, it may be smaller then what you should be carrying. You may shoot a threat. However if the combination of the size and speed of the bullet is on the lower end of the handgun scale, it may not be enough to stop the threat. Simply put bigger tends to be better, but where you place your shots is the most important. A small bullet hit to the heart is more effective then a large bullet going over the threat’s head.



Now, with all that said…



It would be in the best interest of all concerned if you took a firearm safety course from an NRA certified instructor. They can give you lessons in safe firearm handling, gun related terminology and functionality that may impact your selection. Not to mention information regarding marksmanship, bullet design, related stories, news articles, and other gun related information that will greatly enhance your understanding of and ability to use firearms.



---



Now take her to a few gun shows and stores and let her pick them all up....;)



v/r

Pourshot
 

cs9c1

Regular Member
Joined
Jun 17, 2006
Messages
548
Location
Mechanicsville, Virginia, USA
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Wow, pourshot, I now feel inadequate after comparing your reply to mine:(.

Just kidding, great write up.

Going to a range that allows you to rent several weapons is a great help in making a decision.
 

jimwyant

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Joined
Jul 8, 2006
Messages
342
Location
Mebane, North Carolina, USA
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For the record, I would like to say how jealous I am of those of you whose wives are into guns, especially enough to carry. It is one thing to go to the range with you, and even another go pop of a few rounds from time to time, but to be interested enough to get a CCW license or OC, that is something to cherish.

I love my wife dearly, and she supports my decision to carry. Sometimes she is less than understanding when I have a negative OC experience (...well, you should expect reactions like that if you put it out there for everyone to see...) but she certainly isn't against my guns and my choice to carry them. However, she has only been to the range with me twice. The first time, she fired two rounds through my Ruger P89 9mm, and the second time she declined to shoot at all. I envy all of you whose spouse shares your passion.
 
A

Arizonatexan

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My wife and I recently moved to Arizona from Texas. We're both just cowboy county folks and both of us grew up with guns. When we got married we went looking for the best gun we could conceal carry - since Texas doesn't have OC. Where we lived was on the Gulf Coast of Texas where it is hot and humid and folks don't wear a lot of clothing you can comfortably hide a handgun under. We wanted something reliable, light weight and small but we also wanted something accurate and fun to shoot together at the range. We used to shoot about once a week at our local indoor range. It's a hobby we share. We settled on the Bersa 380 Thunder. It met all of our requirements and is fairly inexpensive. My wife CC in her purse 24/7. Her purseis specifically made for the purpose with an easily accessible inner holster that fits the Bersa perfectly. She also carries a small fanny pack when she's out and about in shorts and a t-shirt and doesn't want to carry her purse. The fanny pack is also specially made for CC. We both carried Bersa's for several years now and I've found them to be completely trouble free. The Bersa fits her hand perfectly and she can control it perfectly at the range. Shefrequently out scores me. Now that we are in Arizona Ifrequentlyopen carry myColt Gov 45 1911, but I sometimes carry my Bersa open as well. My wife still carries CC. She's used to it that way. I've found the 380 round to be a really good compromise for accuracy, weight, fit, price, and ease of handling.

Arizona-Texan
 

AlaskanAtHeart

Regular Member
Joined
Jun 9, 2006
Messages
41
Location
Fairbanks, Alaska, USA
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Jim
(for some reason, I can't post below a quote, wonder if Firefox is causing that???)

I find your post "funny" because I would love to CC, but two things stop me, LOL. First, my husband would flip, and second, 90% of the time I'm out of my home, I'm on military property where weapons aren't allowed :?

I thought about applying for a CC permit here in Alaska, but decided against it when I found out that having one no longer allows you to skip the NICS. That's pretty much the only reason to have it here, unless you need recipricocity when travelling, which I try not to do, since it's such a long drive to other states, not to mention having to pass through Canada, LOL.

(Everyone legal to own a gun can CC or OC in Alaska without a permit, except on prhibited properties)

I do consider myself extremely lucky that hubby and I have discovered something we both enjoy doing (shooting). Perhaps one day you will be able to convince your wife to join you on the range again.

My dad has had a CCWP for as long as I can remember, my step-mom won't touch a gun unless absolutely necessary. They live in the country, though, so my dad can just go shoot in his yard, rather than trekking to a range.

jimwyant wrote:
For the record, I would like to say how jealous of those of you whose wives are into guns, especially enough to carry. It is one thing to go to the range with you, and even another go pop of a few rounds from time to time, but to be interested enough to get a CCW license or OC, that is something to cherish.

I love my wife dearly, and she supports my decision to carry. Sometimes she is less than understanding when I have a negative OC experience (...well, you should expect reactions like that if you put it out there for everyone to see...) but she certainly isn't against my guns and my choice to carry them. However, she has only been to the range with me twice. The first time, she fired two rounds through my Ruger P89 9mm, and the second time she declined to shoot at all. I envy all of you whose spouse shares your passion.
 

VAopencarry

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Joined
May 9, 2006
Messages
2,151
Location
Berryville-ish, VA
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AlaskanAtHeart wrote:
Jim
(for some reason, I can't post below a quote, wonder if Firefox is causing that???)

I find your post "funny" because I would love to CC, but two things stop me, LOL. First, my husband would flip, and second, 90% of the time I'm out of my home, I'm on military property where weapons aren't allowed :?

I thought about applying for a CC permit here in Alaska, but decided against it when I found out that having one no longer allows you to skip the NICS. That's pretty much the only reason to have it here, unless you need recipricocity when travelling, which I try not to do, since it's such a long drive to other states, not to mention having to pass through Canada, LOL.

(Everyone legal to own a gun can CC or OC in Alaska without a permit, except on prhibited properties)

I do consider myself extremely lucky that hubby and I have discovered something we both enjoy doing (shooting). Perhaps one day you will be able to convince your wife to join you on the range again.

My dad has had a CCWP for as long as I can remember, my step-mom won't touch a gun unless absolutely necessary. They live in the country, though, so my dad can just go shoot in his yard, rather than trekking to a range.

jimwyant wrote:
For the record, I would like to say how jealous of those of you whose wives are into guns, especially enough to carry. It is one thing to go to the range with you, and even another go pop of a few rounds from time to time, but to be interested enough to get a CCW license or OC, that is something to cherish.

I love my wife dearly, and she supports my decision to carry. Sometimes she is less than understanding when I have a negative OC experience (...well, you should expect reactions like that if you put it out there for everyone to see...) but she certainly isn't against my guns and my choice to carry them. However, she has only been to the range with me twice. The first time, she fired two rounds through my Ruger P89 9mm, and the second time she declined to shoot at all. I envy all of you whose spouse shares your passion.

It's not Firefox. I am using version 1.5.0.4. Click under the quoted portion, sometimes you won't see the blinking cursor but if you start typing it works. hth
 

Tess

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Joined
Jun 15, 2006
Messages
3,837
Location
Bryan, TX
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Arizonatexan wrote:
My wife and I recently moved to Arizona from Texas. We're both just cowboy county folks and both of us grew up with guns. When we got married we went looking for the best gun we could conceal carry - since Texas doesn't have OC. Where we lived was on the Gulf Coast of Texas where it is hot and humid and folks don't wear a lot of clothing you can comfortably hide a handgun under. We wanted something reliable, light weight and small but we also wanted something accurate and fun to shoot together at the range. We used to shoot about once a week at our local indoor range. It's a hobby we share. We settled on the Bersa 380 Thunder. It met all of our requirements and is fairly inexpensive. My wife CC in her purse 24/7. Her purseis specifically made for the purpose with an easily accessible inner holster that fits the Bersa perfectly. She also carries a small fanny pack when she's out and about in shorts and a t-shirt and doesn't want to carry her purse. The fanny pack is also specially made for CC. We both carried Bersa's for several years now and I've found them to be completely trouble free. The Bersa fits her hand perfectly and she can control it perfectly at the range. Shefrequently out scores me. Now that we are in Arizona Ifrequentlyopen carry myColt Gov 45 1911, but I sometimes carry my Bersa open as well. My wife still carries CC. She's used to it that way. I've found the 380 round to be a really good compromise for accuracy, weight, fit, price, and ease of handling.

Arizona-Texan
Arizona-Texan - good choice. I LOVE my Bersa 380 Thunder. Excellent OC weapon; just the right weight. Easy to carry a spare mag or two. Small enough to conceal in my purse if necessary (I have two concealment purses).
 
A

Arizonatexan

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I'm glad you endorse the Bersa too, Tess. It's kind-of a surprise to many folks. I don't know why they are not more popular. Everyone I've met that has tried a Bersa loves them! I recently ordered a wrap-around rubber finger grip for mine and it really enhanced the feel and control. It was a little pricey but well worth it. It's made by Bersa specifically for the 380 Thunder. If you are interested I'll send you the link. I also ordered the new leather Galco Stinger holster specifically made for the Bersa. I have not received it yet but I think it will really be nice. My wife is a dead-eye with hers and shoots consistent tight groups at 30 feet. She really likes her concealed purse but the only draw back is the time it takes to deploy her hand gun. She doesn't particularly like a belt holster because she says it pulls her pants down! Whoops! What kind of holster do you wear? I'll pass along the info to her.

Thanks a lot.

Arizona-Texan
 

zoom6zoom

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Jun 24, 2006
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Dale City, VA, Virginia, USA
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She doesn't particularly like a belt holster because she says it pulls her pants down!
The problem usually isn't with the holster - it's with the belt. You can't expect a regular dress belt to support your sidearm properly. I'm sure others will have recommendations as well, but I've been really happy with the products from http://www.thebeltman.net/
 

Dutch Uncle

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May 11, 2006
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Virginia, USA
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I have always liked my Bersa 380, though I rarely use it for OC. I did get a small holster for it from JBP in Richmond (their #208). It fits PERFECTLY and is quite comfortable to wear. Has a thumb snap retention strap, and came with a spring clip on the outside so it could be used for IWB carry. I took the stitching out and removed the clip, as I prefer OWB only. They come in black and brown and are made of good quality leather. I think it was something like $38.
 

Tess

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Jun 15, 2006
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Bryan, TX
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zoom6zoom wrote:
She doesn't particularly like a belt holster because she says it pulls her pants down!
The problem usually isn't with the holster - it's with the belt. You can't expect a regular dress belt to support your sidearm properly. I'm sure others will have recommendations as well, but I've been really happy with the products from http://www.thebeltman.net/

I have to admit that when I am not at work I wear jeans or scrubs. I bought a solid (double) belt from First American Ordnance, and wear a JBP holster. It's comfortable, easy to get to, and feels good.

In business clothes, I HAVE to carry concealed. There is no rig available (at least that I've found) that will work on a suit - particularly on a large woman. AND, I have to carry concealed ina purse or portfolio. I've tried the pager pal (don't even get me started on what a waste of $70 that thing was). I know there's one that fits under the zipper of a pair of pants, can't remember what it's called, but since most of my fat is in my gut, it's not really realistic for me.

Short of adapting a special belt that doesn't go with any of my work clothes, I end up leaving the gun in the car if we go somewhere for dinner. NOT a choice I care to make, but I haven't found a solution.
 
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