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Thread: Considering classes and buying a gun...

  1. #1
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    I've been considering taking plenty of gun training classes (my first one will be next week) and eventually owning my own handgun for both protection and as a sort of hobby. I just turned 21, and am still in college. I am fortunate enough to have parents that will let me stay with them until I can afford being out on my own. I just brought this issue up with my mother this evening. We didn't discuss much yet, but she doesn't mind me taking classes to learn how to use a gun, but she does NOT want a gun in the house. I mentioned safety and whatnot, but she insists nothing will ever happen to us at the house. Silly, I know as you can never predict trouble as it comes at any time in any form. Anyway, it was late and didn't want to keep pestering her at the time. It will be a while before I am ready to purchase my own firearm anyway and who knows where I will be and if her mind will change by then.

    Anyway, anyone have any advice for now on what to tell her to maybe ease her mind or change her mind on the whole idea? I love my parents, and I'm not going to be sneaking a weapon around THEIR house if they don't want one in it. THEIR house, THEIR rules. Fair enough to me. But while I'm going through the classes and training, maybe there are soem good talking points that I can use to approach her on the subject.

    And for those wondering, my dad just goes with whatever my mom says.

    P.S. I'm sorry if this is not the correct sub-forum. I didn't see a newbie section or anything, so I took my best guess.

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    First of all, welcome to OCDO. You'll find us a friendly, but honest bunch of folks. We take our rights seriously, even though some on this forum do not and often antagonize us.

    I would not pressure your parents to learn. Read these forums and other related articles and books. Read enough and you will begin breathing and living those things and it will eventually rub off. Sometimes it won't, but I found in several of my scenarios, this was the case.

    Good luck and happy carrying!

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    The only suggestion I have is to try to find out exactly why she doesn't want a gun in the house. It could be a million reasons. Once you know what the exact problemor problems areyou can work to reconcile the issues. Just take it one step at a time. It took my brother and I over a year to be able to get motorcycles.

    I respect the fact you honor your parents wishes especially while in their home. That will help your case and help your life.

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    Welcome to OCDO RockF!
    I also admire your respect for your parents and agree that the best approach is low pressure....ask questions to determine what their objections are....read/learn all you can on the facts...educate them "gently".
    With this approach, I think that the worse that can happen is that they will respect your desision to become a responsible gun owner.....even if they still never want a gun in their house.


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    It has been my experience that many people who are nervous around guns are that way due to lack of familiarity, after all, they have been told all their lives that guns just attack people all the time at random. As such I would suggest taking your mom to a range, if she is flexible enough to do that. There are some ranges where you can rent guns, since you dont have one yet. I'm sure someone here could suggest ranges to you if you tell us what city/state you live in (maybe fill in your location in your profile).

    I took my mother shooting a while after I got into it, it helped her to feel a bit more comfortable with the idea of guns being in the house.

    Edit: I get the feeling that she raised you to be a good person, asuming she believes she succeded in that task, she should be eventually accepting of the concept of you owning guns. Even if it's not while you live in their home.

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    My mom was the same way. She freaked out when I told her I was getting my CPL, and a pistol. She said I couldn't have a gun in the house. I got both anyway. It's a lot less scary in person, when I showed her that even if there is a loaded magazine in the gun, you have to remove the safety and rack the slide before it could possibly shoot.

    If your mom vehemently denies you having a gun in the house, tell her that you will keep the magazine seperated from the gun at all times. This way it is utterly impossible for any accident to happen (especially if you gun has a safety which does not allow it to be fired without a magazine, even if there is 1 in the chamber).



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    Thanks for all the input guys! I agree on the low pressure approach, even more subtle points to begin with. I'm sure she will see both sides eventually. Taking her to a range would be a great idea once I've taken some classes, even if it is for her to just watch me shoot and handle a gun so she can see they're not so bad.

    And I will update my profile right after this post! I live in Mesa, Arizona so any suggestions on ranges/awesome instructors around here would be greatly appreciated!

    Also, thanks for the warm welcome. I hope to stick around and let everyone know how things come along! :celebrate

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    RockF.....
    If you could swing training at http://www.frontsight.com/ ....you will never be disappointed with the quality and professionalism.

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    RockF, I've heard good things about the indoor range near Stapely and the 60. They used to (and may still) have a pistol course geared specifically toward women. (Not that you need that, but it is an indication that they would be sympathetic towards your mom's discomfort around guns. They may have some advice on how to help her feel more comfortable.)

    I don't recall the name of the range, but you can see the sign on the building on the South side of the 60 not far east of Stapely. "Indoor Shooting Range." Any gun shop in town should be familiar with it.

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    Thanks again for the suggestions guys. I've read a little about Frontsight and it seems amazing. I definitely would love to spend a few days there later on.

    mzbk2l wrote:
    RockF, I've heard good things about the indoor range near Stapely and the 60. They used to (and may still) have a pistol course geared specifically toward women. (Not that you need that, but it is an indication that they would be sympathetic towards your mom's discomfort around guns. They may have some advice on how to help her feel more comfortable.)

    I don't recall the name of the range, but you can see the sign on the building on the South side of the 60 not far east of Stapely. "Indoor Shooting Range." Any gun shop in town should be familiar with it.
    Yeah, this is the only range I've really heard of other than one up on Ellsworth and somewhere north. I'm stopping by either today before work or Monday to check out their facilities. Over the phone they've seemed very nice and helpful so we will see! Any word on some good gunshops in town?

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    Does your mom use the nternet?

    http://a-human-right.com/



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    You could keep the weapon in a safe deposit box at a bank, we have many clients whom keep firearms in their safe deposit boxes.

    Maybe have your mom take a class with you? It would probably take a bit of talking, but I bet she would enjoy it, and ease up a bit.

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    Ryan,

    Just curious since you brought it up, how many greenbacks would a person have to fork over for a handgun sized box?

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    RockF wrote:
    Thanks for all the input guys! I agree on the low pressure approach, even more subtle points to begin with. I'm sure she will see both sides eventually. Taking her to a range would be a great idea once I've taken some classes, even if it is for her to just watch me shoot and handle a gun so she can see they're not so bad.

    And I will update my profile right after this post! I live in Mesa, Arizona so any suggestions on ranges/awesome instructors around here would be greatly appreciated!

    Also, thanks for the warm welcome. I hope to stick around and let everyone know how things come along! :celebrate
    RockF-

    Welcome to the forum. Your parents will indeed see your respect for their rules and desires in their home in a very positive light. While many of the suggestions here are very good, perhaps you could find one of the classes you are planning to take that would allow your Mother to attend with you. Even if she was to sit in on only part of the class, it might help. Moreover, if she does accept having a firearm in her house, it would be a good idea for her to know more about firearms for everyones safety.

    By the way, someone suggested just removing the magazine to make the weapon safe. Many firearms are not made safe by simply removing the magazine. Arguably the ones that do have such firing lockouts are not technically safe either. NEVER depend on ANY mechanical safety for safe handling of a firearm. The only truly safe firearms are those that are unloaded, and the action cleared of any chambered rounds, and subsequently kept pointed in a safe direction.

    Again welcome to the forum.

    Regards
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    nakedshoplifter wrote:
    Ryan,

    Just curious since you brought it up, how many greenbacks would a person have to fork over for a handgun sized box?
    Well for a 5x10 you are talking about 45 dollars a year, that is with no discounts...

    However there are some that will fit smaller handguns for 25 a year.

    You should see some of the crap people keep in these things!

  16. #16
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    As a parent of two grown girls, I have to commend you regarding yourintent to honor your parents' wishes and to abide by their rules in their home. That kind of respect is wanting in many parts of the country.

    As for having a firearm in their home, you might try persuasion (of the respectfully and kindly type) along with education as has been brought up. However, if you cannot budge their viewpoint, you'll just have to live with it and save your money to get your own place. I was living at home when I bought my first gun. Neither my mom or my step-dad were happy about this, but they never told me I had to get it out of their home. I suspect after a time, they saw that I was responsible, so they had no further problems with it.

    Good luck.


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    Sitrep wrote:
    It has been my experience that many people who are nervous around guns are that way due to lack of familiarity, after all, they have been told all their lives that guns just attack people all the time at random. As such I would suggest taking your mom to a range, if she is flexible enough to do that. There are some ranges where you can rent guns, since you dont have one yet. I'm sure someone here could suggest ranges to you if you tell us what city/state you live in (maybe fill in your location in your profile).

    I took my mother shooting a while after I got into it, it helped her to feel a bit more comfortable with the idea of guns being in the house.
    I agree 10000%. I grew up on a farm and my dad started me shooting when I was 6. All my friends grew up shooting. Then I went to college and beyond and made new friends and most were unknowing about guns and initially appeared "anti-gun".

    Once you get to a position where you are absolutely positive you know how to handle your gun safely and are a decent shot, convince them to tag along and go to a range with the ultimate objective to teach her how to PROPERLY shoot and handle a firearm.


    Now, that's easier said than done. Here's the tactics I've used in the past:

    Surround yourself with normal pro-gun friends when with your parents. Normal meaning no crack addicts, etc. Odds are your friends at the range won't be. Just a hunch.

    Convince their friends to learn how to use guns. They'll get more interested. It's easier to do this with college friends than parents, obviously. But try to get your dad interested first. I can guarentee that it'll be easier to take him to the range and he'll help convince your mother, even if you don't notice it. Or introduce your siblings to the topic, if you have any.

    Talk about your experiences with a gun and let her eavesdrop on them. Whether it's a learning experience at the range, arguing caliber types with your brother, or telling a hunting story, they all introduce a feeling of ease with firearms. Or maybe you can tell her over dinner how you joined an online forum for gun related topics and are researching all relevant statutes in your state, because you don't want to break the law.


    And the most important:

    Get a part time job at a gun range if at all possible. This wasn't really a tactic persay, but I worked part time at a sporting clay/hunting lodge from age 13 to 20. You will learn way more about shooting from watching hundreds of other people shoot than incremental classes (Still definitely take a first one, though). You'll notice little things, like 1% (2 or 3 every case) of Winchester AA shotgun shells will have bad primers. For shotgunning that isn't a big deal. But for handguns, that could be your life.

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    I didn't even tell my mom when I got my first gun (I had turned 18, and the day after I got a rifle). She was pretty suprised when she found a .22 and a couple bricks of ammo in my closet... hah. She didn't kick me out or anything. She actually ended up getting a nice taurus for herself about a year later. I think it may be that your parents don't really know a lot about them, as opposed to simply hating them.

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    Well I went to my first class last night and it was very fun, interesting and informative. We were in the classroom for much of the evening then went out to fire live rounds. I did pretty well at 10 yards, considering I haven't shot since I was a little kid.

    Anyway, my mom asked how it went this morning and seemed semi-interested. Although she still says she will never go shooting. The idea of talking to her about my experiences seems the best way to go. Once she sees I am safe and know how to handle a firearm, maybe she will ease up a little bit.

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    I'm lucky enough to have grown up around guns, though my mother is somewhat afraid of them. It was a surprise to her when I was having trouble with a roommate not wanting me to keep my.45 loaded. She didn't know why that would bea problem, citing the "fact" that my father didn't feel the need to keep a bedside gun loaded. My father informed her that he did have one pistol loaded. She still didn't see why I couldn't just disarm for my roommate, but it seemed funny that she had no idea about the loaded gun in her bedroom.

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    It seems like you're doing everything you should be doing. As far as parents go, my mom knew I had a gun for over two years, but she only recently "found out." Apparently, she's so afraid of them, she forgot that I owned any! To make it even more amusing, it took about a week of open carrying for her to even notice I was wearing it. She randomly said "Is that a gun?!" I almost laughed in her face

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