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What does it mean to you to be "manly"?

expvideo

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So we toss around the word "manly" a lot here, and generally reffering to large caliber weapons or the smell of burnt gun powder. I thought it would be nice to take a moment and define what each of us thinks it means to be a man. I don't mean "have a penis", that makes you male. I mean what is it that you consider to be the characteristics that constitute "manliness". These are all opinions, so let's hear them.

To me, a real man:

-Is dependable. He does what he says he will do, and his word is his bond. He doesn't need to sign a contract because his handshake is just as good.

-Is honest. He never lies or tells half truthes. He is proud of his accomplishments, and willing to admit when he has made a mistake.

-Is humble. He doesn't feel that he has anything to prove and preffers pride in his accomplishments over notariety. He puts his family before himself.

-Is faithful. He does not cheat or believe that "it's ok to look". The woman in his life may as well be the only woman in the world.

-Is hard working. He does not pay another man to do a job that he could do himself. He does not expect life to be fair, and works hard to keep from relying on fairness.

-Is respectful. He thanks veterans and treats the elderly with dignity. He holds doors and thanks people when they make kind gestures.

-Is patient. He does not lose his temper.

-Is calm. No matter what happens, he does not lose his head. He remains calm and collected to help the people around him.

-Is fair. He makes sure to treat others as they treat him, and when shown an act of kindness will gladly return the favor. He thinks about the way his actions will affect others.

-Is honorable. His character stands out, and people know that they can trust him to make the right decisions.

-Is capable of defending life. He is willing and able to protect the people he cares about, and always puts their safety first. He does not rely on others to protect what is his.



Now what do you think defines what it is to be a man?
 

imperialism2024

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Hmpf, I'm gonna have to go with big bores and the smell of gunpowder.

But seriously, it depends on the context of the term "manly". Surely, a woman who is an amazing human being exhibits the same characteristics that you list, just like the men for whom your list is meant. It's also not correct to define manly as "all the things that women don't typically do/like" as that's just a mirror of socialized gender roles, although the latter is what I reference when using the term "manly".

:?
 

expvideo

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imperialism2024 wrote:
Hmpf, I'm gonna have to go with big bores and the smell of gunpowder.

But seriously, it depends on the context of the term "manly". Surely, a woman who is an amazing human being exhibits the same characteristics that you list, just like the men for whom your list is meant. It's also not correct to define manly as "all the things that women don't typically do/like" as that's just a mirror of socialized gender roles, although the latter is what I reference when using the term "manly".

:?
Like I said, it's all about opinion. To me, it means a certain kind of selfless honor, but to you it could mean doing things that women don't generally like doing. That's why I think it will be interesting to get everyone's idea of what it means to them, since it can't haveone real deffinition, being an opinion statement.
 

molonlabetn

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Howabout: "Is Responsible"

To me, that's the surest sign that a boy has become a man... when he is quick to be responsible for his own life, and his own actions.
 

PT111

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, South Carolina, USA
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To me the easiest thing to define a man is that he doesn't worry about whether he is one or not.

He doesn't worry about whether a pink shirt makes him look like a sissy.

He doesn't worry that someone else's team scored more points.

He doesn't worry when some drunk idiot makes a smart remark about him.

He doesn't worry about someone having a trophy wife.

He doesn't worry that his gun may not strike fear into the heart of the BG.

There was a ad campaign a few years back that summed it up. "Most any male can be a father but it takes a real man to be a Daddy".

But most of all a man is honest, does his best to do what he says he will do and treats all people with respect and courtesy.

And a real man never worries about someone else's definition of what a man is.
 

FogRider

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How about: Is mostly a term I use in jest, and mean rather little by.

-Is dependable. He does what he says he will do, and his word is his bond. He doesn't need to sign a contract because his handshake is just as good. -Is honest. He never lies or tells half truthes. He is proud of his accomplishments, and willing to admit when he has made a mistake.
-Is humble. He doesn't feel that he has anything to prove and preffers pride in his accomplishments over notariety. He puts his family before himself.
-Is faithful. He does not cheat or believe that "it's ok to look". The woman in his life may as well be the only woman in the world.
-Is hard working. He does not pay another man to do a job that he could do himself. He does not expect life to be fair, and works hard to keep from relying on fairness.
-Is respectful. He thanks veterans and treats the elderly with dignity. He holds doors and thanks people when they make kind gestures.
-Is patient. He does not lose his temper.
-Is calm. No matter what happens, he does not lose his head. He remains calm and collected to help the people around him.
-Is fair. He makes sure to treat others as they treat him, and when shown an act of kindness will gladly return the favor. He thinks about the way his actions will affect others.
-Is honorable. His character stands out, and people know that they can trust him to make the right decisions.
-Is capable of defending life. He is willing and able to protect the people he cares about, and always puts their safety first. He does not rely on others to protect what is his.
I would rather be called any of those than just "manly". To me "manly" is not realy a word I put a whole lot of value in.
 

Tess

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expvideo wrote:
So we toss around the word "manly" a lot here, and generally reffering to large caliber weapons or the smell of burnt gun powder. I thought it would be nice to take a moment and define what each of us thinks it means to be a man. I don't mean "have a penis", that makes you male. I mean what is it that you consider to be the characteristics that constitute "manliness". These are all opinions, so let's hear them.

To me, a real man:

-Is dependable. He does what he says he will do, and his word is his bond. He doesn't need to sign a contract because his handshake is just as good.

-Is honest. He never lies or tells half truthes. He is proud of his accomplishments, and willing to admit when he has made a mistake.

-Is humble. He doesn't feel that he has anything to prove and preffers pride in his accomplishments over notariety. He puts his family before himself.

-Is faithful. He does not cheat or believe that "it's ok to look". The woman in his life may as well be the only woman in the world.

-Is hard working. He does not pay another man to do a job that he could do himself. He does not expect life to be fair, and works hard to keep from relying on fairness.

-Is respectful. He thanks veterans and treats the elderly with dignity. He holds doors and thanks people when they make kind gestures.

-Is patient. He does not lose his temper.

-Is calm. No matter what happens, he does not lose his head. He remains calm and collected to help the people around him.

-Is fair. He makes sure to treat others as they treat him, and when shown an act of kindness will gladly return the favor. He thinks about the way his actions will affect others.

-Is honorable. His character stands out, and people know that they can trust him to make the right decisions.

-Is capable of defending life. He is willing and able to protect the people he cares about, and always puts their safety first. He does not rely on others to protect what is his.



Now what do you think defines what it is to be a man?
I'd say these are the things that make a PERSON worth emulating, worth associating with, worth knowing.

If that makes you feel "manly", so be it. I think it defines character.
 

OC-Glock19

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This is a poem that I put on a memorial web page that I madefor my dad when he passed away. I think it's appropriate to answer the question posed by the OP.

A Real Man
by Edgar Guest

Men are of two kinds, and he
was of the kind I'd like to be.


Some preach their virtues, and a few
express their lives by what they do.

That sort was he. No flowery phrase
or glibly spoken words of praise

won friends for him. He wasn't cheap
or shallow, but his course ran deep.

And it was pure. You know the kind.
Not many in a life you find

whose deeds outrun their words so far
that more than what they seem they are.

There are two kinds of lies as well:
The kind you live, the ones you tell.

Back through his years from age to youth
he never acted one untruth.

Out in the open light he fought
and didn't care what others thought

nor what they said about his fight
If he believed that he was right.

The only deeds he ever hid
were acts of kindness that he did.

What speech he had was plain and blunt.
His was an unattractive front.

Yet children loved him; babe and boy
played with the strength he could employ,

without one fear, and they are fleet
to sense injustice and deceit.

No back door gossip linked his name
with any shady tale of shame.

He did not have to compromise
with evil-doers, shrewd and wise,

and let them ply their vicious trade
because of some past escapade.

Men are of two kinds, and he
was of the kind I'd like to be.

No door at which he ever knocked
against his manly form was locked.

If ever man on earth was free
and independent, it was he.

No broken pledge lost him respect,
he met all men with head erect,

and when he passed, I think there went
a soul to yonder firmament

so white, so splendid and so fine
it came almost to God's design.

 

WhiteFeather

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Oley, Pennsylvania, USA
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Generally I think everyone is way off...

The above do not describe "manly" what so ever. They describe an honest and good person. Anyone can be those things, male, female inbetweens. The idea that "manly" and "girly" are the same are perposterous.

"Manly" things are things that require great strength and power to wield. A-10 Warthogs, S&W 500 hand cannons. Loud Harleys, Battle Ships, 1971 Chevelle LS/SS 454 big block monsters. Things that are ugly and beautiful, but for the most part are uneeded.

Can woman use these things? Of course "manly" things are not exclusively used by males. Women are just smarter. They think more with the logical side of their brains when it comes to tasks and work.

The idea the men and woman are the same is flawed. Equal yes, but the same not a chance. It is those great strengths and weaknesses that make this world so deverse. No I do not think for a moment that "manly" things or "manlieness" have anything to do with honesty or just dealing. For one to imply that is to imply that "girly" things are the antonym. I dare you to open that can of worms. :what:
 

expvideo

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I don't find anything "girly" about virtue and character. Anyone can like battleships and cannons. nearly anyone can weild a 500 magnum.Few peoplecan admit their mistakes and hold their head high. Few people take responisibility for their actions. There is nothing "girly" about honor. It's something you have to work hard for. Shooting a 500 magnum does not take hard work. I've fired one, and it's not as sinister as you must think. There is nothing manly about it. In fact the person who fired it after me was a woman. At the end of the day, manliness isn't about smoke and noise. At least not to me.
 

PT111

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, South Carolina, USA
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WhiteFeather wrote:
"Manly" things are things that require great strength and power to wield. A-10 Warthogs, S&W 500 hand cannons. Loud Harleys, Battle Ships, 1971 Chevelle LS/SS 454 big block monsters. Things that are ugly and beautiful, but for the most part are uneeded.
I think those things define maleness not manlyness. Big difference.
 

Hef

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Knowing that I am respected for my honor and character makes me feel manly.

Knowing that I am respected for my knowledge and skill with tools makes me feel manly.

Knowing that others genuinely respect my leadership makes me feel manly.

Knowing that my Gina loves me and respects me makes me feel manly.

Protecting and providing for Gina make me feel manly.

Knowing that I am trusted unwaveringly makes me feel manly.

Being successful through diligence and determination makes me feel manly.

Doing the right thing when it's much more difficult to to do than the wrong thing makes me feel manly. Doing the right thing when I know I wouldn't get caught doing the wrong thing makes me feel manly.

Crushing my competition makes me feel very manly. :D
 

TrueBrit

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How about a littlesomething from the late Gunner's Guru, Col. Jeff Cooper, USMC?

To ride hard, shoot straight, and to speak the truth.

It is what I have tried to practice all of my life, and whether this behaviour makes a guy manly or not is for others to say. Interesting, however, to get some form of endorsement from the Guru himself, in such matters. A trifle old fashioned, sure, but then I like old fashioned! Beats the heck out of some of the modern behaviour patterns that one observes from time to time!

TrueBrit.
 

Tomahawk

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Tess wrote:
expvideo wrote:
To me, a real man:

-Is dependable. He does what he says he will do, and his word is his bond. He doesn't need to sign a contract because his handshake is just as good.

-Is honest. He never lies or tells half truthes. He is proud of his accomplishments, and willing to admit when he has made a mistake.

-Is humble. He doesn't feel that he has anything to prove and preffers pride in his accomplishments over notariety. He puts his family before himself.

-Is faithful. He does not cheat or believe that "it's ok to look". The woman in his life may as well be the only woman in the world.

-Is hard working. He does not pay another man to do a job that he could do himself. He does not expect life to be fair, and works hard to keep from relying on fairness.

-Is respectful. He thanks veterans and treats the elderly with dignity. He holds doors and thanks people when they make kind gestures.

-Is patient. He does not lose his temper.

-Is calm. No matter what happens, he does not lose his head. He remains calm and collected to help the people around him.

-Is fair. He makes sure to treat others as they treat him, and when shown an act of kindness will gladly return the favor. He thinks about the way his actions will affect others.

-Is honorable. His character stands out, and people know that they can trust him to make the right decisions.

-Is capable of defending life. He is willing and able to protect the people he cares about, and always puts their safety first. He does not rely on others to protect what is his.
I'd say these are the things that make a PERSON worth emulating, worth associating with, worth knowing.

If that makes you feel "manly", so be it. I think it defines character.

As Tess has pointed out, there is apparently nothing special about being a man. Since women can be all of these things and procreate to boot, what do we need men for, anyway? Thanks to science and societal changes, men may be going extinct.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article3040118.ece

Oh well, I always knew I was useless. Nice knowing you, ladies...
 

SouthernBoy

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Tomahawk wrote:
Tess wrote:
expvideo wrote:
To me, a real man:

-Is dependable. He does what he says he will do, and his word is his bond. He doesn't need to sign a contract because his handshake is just as good.

-Is honest. He never lies or tells half truthes. He is proud of his accomplishments, and willing to admit when he has made a mistake.

-Is humble. He doesn't feel that he has anything to prove and preffers pride in his accomplishments over notariety. He puts his family before himself.

-Is faithful. He does not cheat or believe that "it's ok to look". The woman in his life may as well be the only woman in the world.

-Is hard working. He does not pay another man to do a job that he could do himself. He does not expect life to be fair, and works hard to keep from relying on fairness.

-Is respectful. He thanks veterans and treats the elderly with dignity. He holds doors and thanks people when they make kind gestures.

-Is patient. He does not lose his temper.

-Is calm. No matter what happens, he does not lose his head. He remains calm and collected to help the people around him.

-Is fair. He makes sure to treat others as they treat him, and when shown an act of kindness will gladly return the favor. He thinks about the way his actions will affect others.

-Is honorable. His character stands out, and people know that they can trust him to make the right decisions.

-Is capable of defending life. He is willing and able to protect the people he cares about, and always puts their safety first. He does not rely on others to protect what is his.
I'd say these are the things that make a PERSON worth emulating, worth associating with, worth knowing.

If that makes you feel "manly", so be it. I think it defines character.

As Tess has pointed out, there is apparently nothing special about being a man. Since women can be all of these things and procreate to boot, what do we need men for, anyway? Thanks to science and societal changes, men may be going extinct.

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/men/article3040118.ece

Oh well, I always knew I was useless. Nice knowing you, ladies...
There is a world of difference between men and women and they are certain not equal by any stretch. Each sex brings different gifts to the table.

God didn't make any mistakes when he made the two sexes. We should thank Him for the differences and not try so hard to prove they are the same.
 
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