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Thread: Dyslexic Student Expelled Over Toy Gnu

  1. #1
    Founder's Club Member Tess's Avatar
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    I found this on the SASS site. Enjoy. Catch you all after the weekend.....




    from the Daily Redundancy (http://www.dailyredundancy.com/archives/1055.html

    WATERBURY, CT - A fourth grade Oakville student has been expelled from a Waterbury school for bringing a toy gnu onto the property. The action falls under the school district's 'zero tolerance' policy, according to administrators. Officials believe the student, who is dyslexic, tried to intentionally break the policy.

    "We're convinced he intended to bring a toy gun." said Meredith Simmons, Principal of Waterbury Elementary. "His reading disability may have confused him about what is prohibited in the policy, but we can't take any chances. That's why it's called zero tolerance."

    The expulsion received full approval from the superintendent's office. "We support Principal Simmons' decision." said Milton Decker, Assistant Superintendent. "The toy gnu may seem harmless, but we can't ignore the underlying intent. I seriously doubt any of our students even know what a gnu is."

    The student, who requested to remain amomynous, will be eligible for admission next year following a psychological evaluation and sensitivity training. The toy gnu was confiscated and destroyed by janitorial personnel.
    Laws alone can not secure freedom of expression; in order that every man present his views without penalty there must be spirit of tolerance in the entire population. -Albert Einstein

  2. #2
    State Researcher Kevin Jensen's Avatar
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    That is the funniest damn thing I have heard in a while!!! I don't see any reason for the expulsion though.
    "An armed society is a polite society. Manners are good when one may have to back up his acts with his life." Robert A. Heinlein

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    I could see possible suspension... not expulsion

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    Regular Member SouthernBoy's Avatar
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    openryan wrote:
    I could see possible suspension... not expulsion
    Please tell me you're kidding.

    In the final seconds of your life, just before your killer is about to dispatch you to that great eternal darkness, what would you rather have in your hand? A cell phone or a gun?

    Si vis pacem, para bellum.

    America First!

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    SouthernBoy wrote:
    openryan wrote:
    I could see possible suspension... not expulsion
    Please tell me you're kidding.
    I think the topic of the thread made that kinda obvious...

    Oh, and I'm getting a 404 error on that link.

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    I think the topic of the thread made that kinda obvious...

    Oh, and I'm getting a 404 error on that link.
    The problem is the link needs to be edited, removing the right parenthesis from the link.

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    Perhaps this isn't a second amendment issue at all. We all know the second amendment protects the "right of the people to keep and bear *arms*..." Gnus of course, don't have arms, they have legs...

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    markand wrote:
    Perhaps this isn't a second amendment issue at all. We all know the second amendment protects the "right of the people to keep and bear *arms*..." Gnus of course, don't have arms, they have legs...
    Which brings up with right to keep and bear rams:



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    Its gnus to me that we can bear rams.

    (Sorry, couldn't help myself.)

    Of course, if we did it in the past then,

    Its gnus to me that we could boar rams.

    I bore my ram yesterday.

    My ram is bored with all this talk about gnus.

    I'll make you an offer: I will argue and fight for all of your rights, if you will do the same for me. That is the only way freedom can work. We have to respect all rights, all the time--and strive to win the rights of the other guy as much as for ourselves.

    If I am equal to another, how can I legitimately govern him without his express individual consent?

    There is no human being on earth I hate so much I would actually vote to inflict government upon him.

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    The right to peek and bare gnus shall not be infringed.




    "911? There is a man baring a gnu walking down the street!"

    "Gnudity isn't a crime, ma'am."

    I'll make you an offer: I will argue and fight for all of your rights, if you will do the same for me. That is the only way freedom can work. We have to respect all rights, all the time--and strive to win the rights of the other guy as much as for ourselves.

    If I am equal to another, how can I legitimately govern him without his express individual consent?

    There is no human being on earth I hate so much I would actually vote to inflict government upon him.

  11. #11
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    I guess we really shouldn't worry until the government makes us put fringes on our gnus.

    "Just pimping my gnu, Officer. Is there a problem with that? No, its a personal thing. I don't want to bare my gnu in front of anyone who can't get into an R-rated movie by themselves."
    I'll make you an offer: I will argue and fight for all of your rights, if you will do the same for me. That is the only way freedom can work. We have to respect all rights, all the time--and strive to win the rights of the other guy as much as for ourselves.

    If I am equal to another, how can I legitimately govern him without his express individual consent?

    There is no human being on earth I hate so much I would actually vote to inflict government upon him.

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    Somehow, I just gnu that peeking at my bare rams would bring me an indecency charge... perhaps I should fire my rams, but I don't want to over-pressure them. The bore of the Boer is a +P ram.

    I think I stretched that so farI hurt my neck...

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    Regular Member zoom6zoom's Avatar
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    The student, who requested to remain amomynous, will be eligible for admission next year following a psychological evaluation and sensitivity training.
    I'm sure his belief in Dog will get him through the ordeal.

  14. #14
    Regular Member Marco's Avatar
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    he gnu marswere banned and believed in Dog butSanta over came him.
    If you think like a Statist, act like one, or back some, you've given up on freedom and have gone over to the dark side.
    The easiest ex. but probably the most difficult to grasp for gun owners is that fool permission slip so many of you have, especially if you show it off with pride. You should recognize it as an embarrassment, an infringement, a travesty and an affront to a free person.


    ~Alan Korwin

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    Founder's Club Member OC-Glock19's Avatar
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    Did you hear the one about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He laid awake nights wondering if there really was a dog.

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