imported post
If I might jump in, I would mention the Beretta Cheetah. It's a .380, with an optional tip-up barrel that means you won't have to rack the slide to put a round in the chamber. I have that feature on my Beretta Tomcat (my back-up gun) and it works very well. For those with concerns about the barrel, my little Tomcat shoots straighter than my XD.
For something with a little more stopping power, I would say try a .357 revolver. My wife has handled one, and with the right gun (typically a heavy one, so keep that in mind too) the recoil is less than my XD (that's the .40 sub-compact I'm comparing to). If you find the .357 to be too much, try a .38 special.
I know there are some big-caliber fans on the board, but the smaller calibers still have decent stopping power, and can be easier to shoot straight repeatedly.
Just my opinions. Check out that Cheetah, if you can find one.