What the heck is this crap, this section is called True Tales. Not crazy tales of the unkempt mind and I mean that with what respect there is to offer, but theres so many lunacies that I wouldn't let anyone read this. I understand your trying to have some fun, but you might want to try another non-gun website to post to and refer to. Even then I'm not sure I would pursue this past time.
I want anyone who does read this to notice the OPs biggest mistake here. Stories like this can be brought to court after they seize his computer, when he does actually defend himself. These heroic stories of adventure could lead this guy in a pot of boiling water as a man who pursues deadly situations or fantasies about it. Lessing your case of self-defense. You need to put these thoughts in your aftermath scenerio. Which everyone should already have planned and ready.
Something to be aware of when you guys are spouting about good riddance of BGs.