grumpycoconut
Regular Member
imported post
I was just in the California forum and saw that one of the members there is in a tussle with the San Diego Sheriff over a CCW application. He posted a letter that he submitted to them to complain about how he was being treated. His letter got me thinking about how most folks haven't the foggiest clue about how to write a gripe to the cops. I've written plenty of police reports and read my share of complaint letters and I can tell you that there are certain things that will get your beef letter shared around the office for a good chuckle real fast.
-Thing one. Let your emotions bleed onto the page. Do this and you sound like either a whiner or a wing nut.
-Thing two. Write with a bigger vocabulary than you really have. Keep it simple, keep it clear, don't use words you don't normally use.
-Thing three. Tell the cops you know your rights and how they should do their jobs. I don't like it when folks tell me how to flip burgers and cops don't like being told how to cop.
-Thing four. Ramble. Cops don't like to spend countless hours trying to make sense out of some disjointed, convoluted thing.
The best report writing advise I ever got was, "write it for your mom." Tell a neat, orderly story in chronological order, in the first person and save your citations, opinions, beliefs and analysis for the end. If you are a lawyer or a doctor, for Dog's sake, don't write like a doctor or a lawyer. Write like a person.
Try it this way-
(first of how ever many paragraphs it takes to say what happened)
On such and such a time I was at such and such a place and I did this, that and the other. I met so and so and they did this that and the other. I said this. They said that.
(paragraph on what you think went wrong)
This is how so and so's behavior affected me. These are the rules as I understand them (briefly). This is how I think that their behavior violated the rules.
(paragraph with supporting citations, etc.)
Rule such and such says this. The law say that. The judges have said that the rules and law mean this.
(Paragraph about what's next)
This is what I have done so far. This is what I plan on doing next.
(Paragraph on what you want them to do for you)
Now I'm giving you a list of things you can do to make me happy. Give me my permit. Give me back my money. Be nice to small children and dogs. What ever tickles your fancy.
Thank you for your time. I expect to hear from you in the soonly.
Thanks,
signed, Me (the dude with the beef)
Here's how you can get in touch with me.
I never liked getting beefed and I don't like the idea of beefing cops in general, but sometimes they deserve it. So if you've got to beef a cop at least have the decency to do it well. Keep it clear, keep it straightforward, keep it civil.
I was just in the California forum and saw that one of the members there is in a tussle with the San Diego Sheriff over a CCW application. He posted a letter that he submitted to them to complain about how he was being treated. His letter got me thinking about how most folks haven't the foggiest clue about how to write a gripe to the cops. I've written plenty of police reports and read my share of complaint letters and I can tell you that there are certain things that will get your beef letter shared around the office for a good chuckle real fast.
-Thing one. Let your emotions bleed onto the page. Do this and you sound like either a whiner or a wing nut.
-Thing two. Write with a bigger vocabulary than you really have. Keep it simple, keep it clear, don't use words you don't normally use.
-Thing three. Tell the cops you know your rights and how they should do their jobs. I don't like it when folks tell me how to flip burgers and cops don't like being told how to cop.
-Thing four. Ramble. Cops don't like to spend countless hours trying to make sense out of some disjointed, convoluted thing.
The best report writing advise I ever got was, "write it for your mom." Tell a neat, orderly story in chronological order, in the first person and save your citations, opinions, beliefs and analysis for the end. If you are a lawyer or a doctor, for Dog's sake, don't write like a doctor or a lawyer. Write like a person.
Try it this way-
(first of how ever many paragraphs it takes to say what happened)
On such and such a time I was at such and such a place and I did this, that and the other. I met so and so and they did this that and the other. I said this. They said that.
(paragraph on what you think went wrong)
This is how so and so's behavior affected me. These are the rules as I understand them (briefly). This is how I think that their behavior violated the rules.
(paragraph with supporting citations, etc.)
Rule such and such says this. The law say that. The judges have said that the rules and law mean this.
(Paragraph about what's next)
This is what I have done so far. This is what I plan on doing next.
(Paragraph on what you want them to do for you)
Now I'm giving you a list of things you can do to make me happy. Give me my permit. Give me back my money. Be nice to small children and dogs. What ever tickles your fancy.
Thank you for your time. I expect to hear from you in the soonly.
Thanks,
signed, Me (the dude with the beef)
Here's how you can get in touch with me.
I never liked getting beefed and I don't like the idea of beefing cops in general, but sometimes they deserve it. So if you've got to beef a cop at least have the decency to do it well. Keep it clear, keep it straightforward, keep it civil.
