Convincing the g/f

imported post

Tomahawk wrote:

...

The real problem with someone who feels uncomfortable around firearms and who thinks they don't have to worry much about crime isn't statistics, it's a sense of innocence and a fear of becoming paranoid. She likely thinks of youas a little paranoid; this is a word that gets tossed at me often when I talk to my...less pro-gun...friends and the subject comes up. Most of her friends and family don't carry, so to her carrying is still a bit out of the norm. This is true for many people who aren't really antigun, but aren't really pro-gun, either.

...

Of course, you cannot force this idea on her any more than you can statistics, but you can bring the subject up from time to time in conversation, and let her know the roots of your beliefs (you'll have to have had that conversation sooner or later if she's a keeper anyway). Hopefully, the light will come on over her head one of these days.

Click to expand...

Go print out http://munchkinwrangler.wordpress.com/2009/08/25/a-vote-for-gun-control-is-a-vote-for-thunderdome/and give it to her and tell her you want her to read it. Tell her it is up to her if she wants to talk about it after she reads it.

Other folks have said just about the same thing. Marko has a pretty good way of getting the idea across without sounding like he is preaching or ordering.

stay safe.

skidmark

imported post

Tomahawk wrote:

<snip> .... the idea of personal responsibility and independence; taking charge of your own life and not leaving the job of protecting it up to others.

Click to expand...

One other thing to consider. Most non-gun people rely on the police to protect them. 911 works vastly different in areas of the country. I had people breaking down our door and after calling 911 five times two police officers showed up 3 hours later. (happend in NY while unarmed)

So if you have anyone in your area that "has" called 911 for some emperical data that might help her understand the saying, "When seconds count, the police are minutes away!".

imported post

45acpForMe wrote:

Tomahawk wrote:

<snip> .... the idea of personal responsibility and independence; taking charge of your own life and not leaving the job of protecting it up to others.

Click to expand...

One other thing to consider. Most non-gun people rely on the police to protect them. 911 works vastly different in areas of the country. I had people breaking down our door and after calling 911 five times two police officers showed up 3 hours later. (happend in NY while unarmed)

So if you have anyone in your area that "has" called 911 for some emperical data that might help her understand the saying, "When seconds count, the police are minutes away!".

Click to expand...

The other side of that coin is that it has been proven in court time and time again that the police have NO responsibilty to protect individuals. An interesting read:

http://www.firearmsandliberty.com/kasler-protection.html

imported post

skidmark wrote:

Go print out http://munchkinwrangler.wordpress.com/2009/08/25/a-vote-for-gun-control-is-a-vote-for-thunderdome/and give it to her and tell her you want her to read it. Tell her it is up to her if she wants to talk about it after she reads it.

Other folks have said just about the same thing. Marko has a pretty good way of getting the idea across without sounding like he is preaching or ordering.

stay safe.

skidmark

Click to expand...

I think I read that in USCCA magazine not to long ago.

imported post

Hmmm... are your girlfriend's roommates good looking? If so, are they single? I could work my magic and change their minds if that would help any. jk:dude:

imported post

All the reason, logic and crime statistics in the world probably isn't going to make any difference. There's an old saying, "You can't teach a pig to sing. You annoy the pig and frustrate yourself."

As I see this, you have 2 issues; one with the roommates and one with your girlfriend. Dealing with your girlfriend first, if the 2 of you aren't on the same page as far as firearms go, where can such a relationship possibly go? If a woman's worldview is so vastly different than yours, how can you possibly expect to find happiness with her?

When I finally began dating after my divorce, I made very sure that I was extremely clear and direct about my views on guns, abortion, religion, taxes, size of government, evolution, money and every other issue that was near and dear to my heart. Not belligerent. Not ram it down your throat direct. Just matter of fact clear. I didn't want to waste my time on even a single date with somebody who was going to get all out of joint if they found out I was carrying a gun. Had that with the first wife and wasn't going to repeat it. I know I scared a few away, but so what? There are plenty of things for a husband and wife to get conflicted about. I'm of the opinion that you shouldn't enter into a relationship of any kind if there are vast differences in key worldview areas. Opposites DON'T attract and DON'T make a happy couple.

I'm now married to a wonderful woman who is so grateful she has a husband willing to protect her. She goes to the range with me, is getting a concealed handgun permit and extols the virtues of going about armed. What a gal!

So, once you get past you and the girlfriend, what do you do about the roommates? They've actually offered what I consider a fine compromise. Simply conceal when you're around them. You'll still have the gun. It will be out of their sight. You'll still have an opportunity to discuss the issue and perhaps even invite them to a range for a shooting session (Me and several women shooting guns at the range. That's a dream date!)

imported post

Just an update. I CCd during an outing with all of the girls the other night. Even my girlfriend smiled and said, "thanks for not bringing your gun with you." I smiled and told her no problem. hehe. Guess I'll have to give up OC for a little bit now and then but better that than not carrying at all.

imported post

proud_to_serveUSAF wrote:

Just an update. I CCd during an outing with all of the girls the other night. Even my girlfriend smiled and said, "thanks for not bringing your gun with you." I smiled and told her no problem. hehe. Guess I'll have to give up OC for a little bit now and then but better that than not carrying at all.

Click to expand...

Uh oh. That doesn't sound promising. Looks to me like a decision in the future. Neither of you are interested in the fight right now, but it looks to me the choice will have to be made down the road...

Keep her and be an unarmed sheep

OR

Start looking for a fellow Sheepdog

She was thanking you for being a sheep. Doesn't look good, Brother. Not good at all... She is probably just as liberal about guns as her roomates, but you obviously do something to "trip her trigger" so you're worth keeping around. She probably thinks she can change you. That's a liberal trait... They can CHANGE the world, YES WE CAN!

:-X

imported post

Looky here Woman, I'm carrying and your roommates can run up an alley and hollar fish! :celebrate

imported post

peter nap wrote:

Looky here Woman, I'm carrying and your roommates can run up an alley and hollar fish! :celebrate

Click to expand...

LMBO! :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

imported post

proud_to_serveUSAF wrote:

Just an update. I CCd during an outing with all of the girls the other night. Even my girlfriend smiled and said, "thanks for not bringing your gun with you." I smiled and told her no problem. hehe. Guess I'll have to give up OC for a little bit now and then but better that than not carrying at all.

Click to expand...

What if she gave you a hug? "No, honey, that's not a gun in my pocket... I'm just so glad to see you."

You might be on to something, though. I don't know why nobody else suggested that yet... lies are the glue that hold relationships together. If you want a long, lasting relationship, you have to lie. And lie a lot; about everything.

...not.

imported post

haha no no no. no lies. i told her later that I was carrying and she was fine with it. She's fine with me open carrying, just doesn't like getting grief from her roommates.

imported post

proud_to_serveUSAF wrote:

haha no no no. no lies. i told her later that I was carrying and she was fine with it. She's fine with me open carrying, just doesn't like getting grief from her roommates.

Click to expand...

Now I'm really confused. At first you said she was uncomfortable about your OC'ing, in part because her friends got upset, in part because she/they saw no need. Then she thanked you for not carrying, but when told later on that you were carrying, she was fine with it. She now doesn't mind if you OC, as long as her friends don't know.

I'm probably missing something here, but something about the changing statements leaves me scratching my head. This isn't new to me. I've been married twice, have had some other major relationships, and despite my concern about being labeled sexist, I'm here to tell you that women are wired up differently than men are. Not better or worse, just differently.

Near the end of his illustrious career, someone asked Freud if he still had any major questions about human nature and he replied "Yes. What does a woman want?"

I guess we're in good company.:?

(Let the flaming begin....)

imported post

Dutch Uncle wrote:

Now I'm really confused. At first you said she was uncomfortable about your OC'ing, in part because her friends got upset, in part because she/they saw no need. Then she thanked you for not carrying, but when told later on that you were carrying, she was fine with it. She now doesn't mind if you OC, as long as her friends don't know.

I'm probably missing something here, but something about the changing statements leaves me scratching my head. This isn't new to me. I've been married twice, have had some other major relationships, and despite my concern about being labeled sexist, I'm here to tell you that women are wired up differently than men are. Not better or worse, just differently.

Near the end of his illustrious career, someone asked Freud if he still had any major questions about human nature and he replied "Yes. What does a woman want?"

I guess we're in good company.:?

(Let the flaming begin....)

Click to expand...

+1, Brother... no flames. Well-put.

imported post

She never minded me carrying whether concealed or openly until it came to her attention that her roommates didn't like it. Then it became a problem OCing at her apt. with them there.

She doesn't have an opinion either way about me carrying really except for that. As far as for herself she was for having a firearm in the apt until her friends said it made them uncomfortable for me to carry. Then she stated she doesn't really care either way if she has one or not because she doesn't think anything will happen with people in the apt.

The other night she thanked me for not carrying because she's used to me OCing or not carrying at all (very seldom happens) so she just thought I didn't have it on me. She was still fine with knowing I did but had it concealed so her friends wouldn't freak out.

I don't know if that summed it up a little better. Probably not lol but hopefully.

imported post

proud_to_serveUSAF wrote:

She never minded me carrying whether concealed or openly until it came to her attention that her roommates didn't like it. Then it became a problem OCing at her apt. with them there.

She doesn't have an opinion either way about me carrying really except for that. As far as for herself she was for having a firearm in the apt until her friends said it made them uncomfortable for me to carry. Then she stated she doesn't really care either way if she has one or not because she doesn't think anything will happen with people in the apt.

The other night she thanked me for not carrying because she's used to me OCing or not carrying at all (very seldom happens) so she just thought I didn't have it on me. She was still fine with knowing I did but had it concealed so her friends wouldn't freak out.

I don't know if that summed it up a little better. Probably not lol but hopefully.

Click to expand...

You may want to share this nice little bedtime story about TEN people together in a college dorm or apartment...:banghead:

http://www.wsbtv.com/news/19365762/detail.html

imported post

Yeah, I had told her about that one when I first read it. And this is when she was still "wanting" to keep a firearm in her place

imported post

I think by this time, I would say to the roomates every time I saw them...

BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (like a sheep)

imported post

lmao i might have to try that. lol then they might ask me to not come back at all haha.

imported post

Isn't that your g/f's decision?