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Thread: My Dilemna

  1. #1
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    Here's the deal.

    I am a 40 something year old Dad of two very little boys going through a divorce. I moved into an apartment complex that promoted itself to be hard core on security and to run background checks on all tenants / neighbors only to discover that more and more of the tenants moving in have criminal backgrounds / drug problems. Its not a bad looking complex but things have decidedly been going down the toilet here since shortly after I moved in when the management changed.

    The point...

    A couple of weeks ago two young white thugs were out screaming their brains out in the parking lot off and on during the night. I tried my best to ignore these two, called security, etc... until they woke up my kids and then moved their antics into the stairwell outside my doorway.

    I asked these two to quiet down and one of them decided to flash a "weapon" he had stuffed into his waistband at me and get mouthy.

    I called the cops. They came out. Found the two thugs...new neighbors apparently just evicted from their old complex for doing the same stupid stuff. The weapon turned out to be one of those airsoft guns made to look like the real deal.

    Because of their stupidity / general thug attitude and the fact the police didn't really do anything to these guys (maybe they couldn't really) I figured it was just a matter of time before they started acting stupid again.

    Tonight they came round to knock on my door and just generally let me know they remember me.

    I'm not really too scared of these two thugs. They are young, small, stupid. I am more nervous for my two little boys. I don't need the added drama of a couple of gang banger wanna be's coming around to play pretend bad boy when I have my kids here.

    I own a handgun. I've had a solid amount of training both with it and with self defense. I'm a big guy. I've been around the block more than once in some pretty hard knock parts of the real big city...like major metro areas not a big small town like Topeka.

    Anyway. At this point I'm thinking I'll probably start wearing a concealed holster while I am in my own home. I don't want my kids spotting me wearing a weapon around them. I'm wondering if anyone has any recommendations for something that works pretty well for them. Again...this would be strictly while I am inside my own dwelling so I know I have the weapon -on me- and secured, not where the kids might stumble on it when I have it out of the gun safe and where I can puts hands on it.

    Honestly I don't think I'm over reacting considering these two punks seem to think its ok to come knocking on my door. I don't plan to interact with them or even open my door when they come around. I'm not looking for any kind of confrontation but I don't want to see warning signs and get caught with my pants down around my ankles should these two decide to try and let themselves inside uninvited.

    Any feedback is appreciated.

    Thanks

  2. #2
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    Logansrun wrote:
    Here's the deal.

    I am a 40 something year old Dad of two very little boys going through a divorce. I moved into an apartment complex that promoted itself to be hard core on security and to run background checks on all tenants / neighbors only to discover that more and more of the tenants moving in have criminal backgrounds / drug problems. Its not a bad looking complex but things have decidedly been going down the toilet here since shortly after I moved in when the management changed.

    The point...

    A couple of weeks ago two young white thugs were out screaming their brains out in the parking lot off and on during the night. I tried my best to ignore these two, called security, etc... until they woke up my kids and then moved their antics into the stairwell outside my doorway.

    I asked these two to quiet down and one of them decided to flash a "weapon" he had stuffed into his waistband at me and get mouthy.

    I called the cops. They came out. Found the two thugs...new neighbors apparently just evicted from their old complex for doing the same stupid stuff. The weapon turned out to be one of those airsoft guns made to look like the real deal.

    Because of their stupidity / general thug attitude and the fact the police didn't really do anything to these guys (maybe they couldn't really) I figured it was just a matter of time before they started acting stupid again.

    Tonight they came round to knock on my door and just generally let me know they remember me.

    I'm not really too scared of these two thugs. They are young, small, stupid. I am more nervous for my two little boys. I don't need the added drama of a couple of gang banger wanna be's coming around to play pretend bad boy when I have my kids here.

    I own a handgun. I've had a solid amount of training both with it and with self defense. I'm a big guy. I've been around the block more than once in some pretty hard knock parts of the real big city...like major metro areas not a big small town like Topeka.

    Anyway. At this point I'm thinking I'll probably start wearing a concealed holster while I am in my own home. I don't want my kids spotting me wearing a weapon around them. I'm wondering if anyone has any recommendations for something that works pretty well for them. Again...this would be strictly while I am inside my own dwelling so I know I have the weapon -on me- and secured, not where the kids might stumble on it when I have it out of the gun safe and where I can puts hands on it.

    Honestly I don't think I'm over reacting considering these two punks seem to think its ok to come knocking on my door. I don't plan to interact with them or even open my door when they come around. I'm not looking for any kind of confrontation but I don't want to see warning signs and get caught with my pants down around my ankles should these two decide to try and let themselves inside uninvited.

    Any feedback is appreciated.

    Thanks
    My advice: Teach your boys about guns and wear it openly. Of course, what you teach them will be age-dependent and continuous over the years.

  3. #3
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    If they were older and I wasn't going through the divorce that would be pretty much my opinion as well.

    They are very little. Only five years old. My x-wife to be is rather liberal and Dad wearing a weapon around the boys would -not- go over well. If that was going to come up I'd much rather it be after all the divorce hulla balloo was over with.

    If the kids were older too, like even seven or eight years old I don't think I'd have as much trouble with it. As young as they are though. I dunno. I'm real hesitant to do the wrong thing.

    I don't need to give mom any reasons to refuse to allow the kids to come see me either.

    The only good news I really have is that my lease is up on a couple of months and I plan to move the heck out of here as soon as possible.

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    You have a point there. A judge is likely to think that having guns is "bad."

    So, you are stuck with CC in your own home (until the divorce is final). The problem is that you cannot train your sons (or they will tell Mom), so you are going to have to take other precautions against them handling your gun.

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    I have a gun safe well out of reach. The weapon is under lock and key at all times. Of course. Generally I am not worried about some idiot kicking down my door in the middle of the night.

    I don't plan to CC for months or anything but maybe for the next couple of weeks until frick and frack get bored / walk out in front of moving traffic or get themselves busted for doing something stupid elsewhere...generally vanish from the scene...I'm thinking I'd better be quite a bit more vigilant than normal.

    So any feedback / ideas on good holsters for CC? I am looking to carry a simple wheel gun. .357 with a fairly short barrel. Not a snub unfortunately...that would be easier to deal with.

    I guess another alternative would be installing a lock into a fairly heavy duty drawer in a cabinet I have in the front room near the couch and just sleeping for a few weeks out on the couch. That way I could just keep the weapon under lock and key and have it reasonably close at hand without having to wear it.

    Sorry. Pondering this thing "out loud" which helps me sort through it I guess.

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    Logansrun wrote:
    The only good news I really have is that my lease is up on a couple of months and I plan to move the heck out of here as soon as possible.
    Is there any way to get out of the lease earlier?

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    Not without getting an attorney involved. The landlord isn't very amicable to the idea although I think I'd have some kind of case for showing that I was promised xyz on their security and tenant background check policy that they are obviously not honoring.

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    Logansrun wrote:
    Not without getting an attorney involved. The landlord isn't very amicable to the idea although I think I'd have some kind of case for showing that I was promised xyz on their security and tenant background check policy that they are obviously not honoring.
    Does the landlord know the cops were called on frick and frack?

    Is there a way to start documenting their unwanted interactions with the landlord?

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    Yes. There was both a police report and the security officer's report. The security officer seemed surprised that frick and frack were not given immediate notice to vacate or at the very least 14 days notice.

    But then...things have changed a lot here under the new managers. Over the last six months I've seen this place go from being a pretty quiet / ok apartment complex to one where more of a certain element are moving in.

    Generally...young, bad attitudes, getting in lots of mouthy fights, lots of drinking, more and more drugs. More and more crappy cars in the parking lots that come and go blasting their "beats". Just generally going down hill. So I'm not really all that surprised that nothing was done by the apartment management either.

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    I can move out as early as two months from now without getting too horribly burned on bailing a month early on my lease. The management might even be cool with that considering the problems in the complex and the fact I've been a really quiet tenant.

    I'm -so- looking forward to moving. I can't even tell you.

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    Logansrun wrote:
    Not without getting an attorney involved. The landlord isn't very amicable to the idea although I think I'd have some kind of case for showing that I was promised xyz on their security and tenant background check policy that they are obviously not honoring.
    Check into "constructive eviction." You were promised security and clearly aren't getting it. You'd have to fight it out in small claims court and you risk having to pay rent for the remainder of the lease. But, you may win and get your deposit back despite leaving before the lease was up.

    Anyway, the landlord might be willing to let you give some small notice instead of his risking losing a constructive eviction case.

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    You might want to look at
    http://www.crossbreedholsters.com/Ho...6/Default.aspx
    I have a couple of their " QwikClip" holsters set up for cross draw.
    Perhaps if you would use a real computer you wouldn't have to apologize for not being able to do so many things on the internet!

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    First, welcome to the forum! I feel for you as you've been put in a bad situation. I would strongly suggest carrying outside of your apartment and to and from your vehicle. What type of firearm(s) do you have and which do you want to carry around your apartment? What do you normally wear around the apartment?

    I'm not avoiding your question but I need more information. I carry everywhere I legally can carry. I carry at home too. In my case, I have larger caliber firearms hidden around my house. So, what I do is either carry my Ruger LCP .380 and sometimes my NAA .22 magnum. Kinda funny, but it depends on which shorts I'm wearing! Some are too lightweight for a .380. I carry them in a pocket holster.

    But, where I spend most of my time, there is a hide out within my reach. I know you can't do that. By the way, are your children too young to teach them about gun safety?

    I just thought of this, a Thunderwear holster might be ideal for you. It is very comfortable with shorts on. If your shirt is out, your gun won't print. It might not be visible even without a shirt. I've worn them at the beach with just shorts on. I was carrying a .45 with a 10 round magazine and 2 extra 10 round magazines. I find it to be a comfortable way to carry.

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    I only read your first post and I totally missed that you stated your son's age. I read later on what revolver you have. If the barrel is long, the Thunderwear might not work for you. I would imagine IWB would be uncomfortable. Sound like a belt holster and an untucked shirt is your answer. Frankly, I would move the heck out of there and find a safer place for you and your wife and children. BUT, I would still carry as there are no guarantees anywhere.

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    Logan's run a great movie.

    I went through a nasty divorce a few years ago too. My wife took my guns and hid the rest. So I went and bought a new one that couldn't be claimed as "community" property. They did bring it to the judge and even my lawyer was horrified. But the judge looked at my record and noted in court that I have done nothing wrong and that this was a bad attempt on my ex's (and my own lawyer ) to paint me as someone I wasn't, and the gun has no bearing on my case. Of course I still got screwed though. Washington!!!!!!!
    I am not anti Cop I am just pro Citizen.

    U.S. v. Minker, 350 US 179, at page 187
    "Because of what appears to be a lawful command on the surface, many citizens, because
    of their respect for what only appears to be a law, are cunningly coerced into waiving their
    rights, due to ignorance." (Paraphrased)

  16. #16
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    sudden valley, i got this red thing on the palm of my hand.......is something going on? heh-heh, i agree with eye95, i agree with all your points. your protection, and protection of your children should be paramount right now. the threat has been made.

  17. #17
    Regular Member sudden valley gunner's Avatar
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    Always a movie I thought they should remake.

    Yea I agree a threat has been made. My guess is they won't go much further than that Stay armed stay vigilant.


    I am not anti Cop I am just pro Citizen.

    U.S. v. Minker, 350 US 179, at page 187
    "Because of what appears to be a lawful command on the surface, many citizens, because
    of their respect for what only appears to be a law, are cunningly coerced into waiving their
    rights, due to ignorance." (Paraphrased)

  18. #18
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    This might not be really popular amongst the "manly" men on this website, but what about a fanny-pack holster, or "man-purse" as abuddy of minecalls it. It works well and you don't have to worry about printing, exposure, etc. I use mine a lot in the summer when I'm wearing shorts, so it would be comfortable to wear around the house. It's also agood place for your keys, speedloaders or whatever.

    Anyway, just my $.02 worth.



  19. #19
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    Have you thought about a fanny pack?



    dang, I got beat to it.
    +1 on fanny pack.

  20. #20
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    uncoolperson wrote:
    Have you thought about a fanny pack?



    dang, I got beat to it.
    +1 on fanny pack.
    people actually use those still :? nothing screams I have a gun like a fanny pack.
    http://youtu.be/xWgVGu3OR4U AACFI, Wisconsin / Minnesota Carry Certified. Action Pistol & Advanced Action pistol concepts + Urban Carbine course. When the entitlement Zombies begin looting, pillaging, raping, burning & killing..remember HEAD SHOTS it's the only way to kill a Zombie. Stockpile food & water now.

    Please support your local,county, state & Federal Law enforcement agencies, right ???

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    Logansrun wrote:
    Anyway. At this point I'm thinking I'll probably start wearing a concealed holster while I am in my own home. I don't want my kids spotting me wearing a weapon around them. I'm wondering if anyone has any recommendations for something that works pretty well for them. Again...this would be strictly while I am inside my own dwelling so I know I have the weapon -on me- and secured, not where the kids might stumble on it when I have it out of the gun safe and where I can puts hands on it.

    Honestly I don't think I'm over reacting considering these two punks seem to think its ok to come knocking on my door. I don't plan to interact with them or even open my door when they come around. I'm not looking for any kind of confrontation but I don't want to see warning signs and get caught with my pants down around my ankles should these two decide to try and let themselves inside uninvited.

    Any feedback is appreciated.

    Thanks

    Nothing wrong with that at all. I keep a few guns scattered about, and one always within arm's reach when I'm at home. I too would carry one holstered if I had to worry about children. I don't know that I would be too worried about the kids seeing it, as I feel that my own kids should see such things, and understand that a gun doesn't mean bad guy, but that's just my personal take on it. I CAN, however, see some reason to keep it hidden if they're of the age where they might be inclined to blab about your gun to all the wrong people.

    You're definitely not overreacting. If you are, then I'm up to batsh** insane since I already keep a gun near me and I live in a high end part of town with a violent crime rate that's astonishingly low. There's NOTHING wrong with prepared, and I don't have any kids, but I imagine that that responsibility makes the choice all that much more clear for you.


    Edit: read your reasons for the concealment aspect, and couldn't agree more with ya. No need to give the ex any more ammo (no pun intended) than necessary.

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    Glock34 wrote:
    uncoolperson wrote:
    Have you thought about a fanny pack?



    dang, I got beat to it.
    +1 on fanny pack.
    people actually use those still :? nothing screams I have a gun like a fanny pack.
    a fanny pack hanging on a book shelf out of reach wouldn't scream gun to a kid though.

  23. #23
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    uncoolperson wrote:
    Glock34 wrote:
    uncoolperson wrote:
    Have you thought about a fanny pack?



    dang, I got beat to it.
    +1 on fanny pack.
    people actually use those still :? nothing screams I have a gun like a fanny pack.
    a fanny pack hanging on a book shelf out of reach wouldn't scream gun to a kid though.
    Nope it screams DRUGS!!!!!! LOL.....just kidding.
    I am not anti Cop I am just pro Citizen.

    U.S. v. Minker, 350 US 179, at page 187
    "Because of what appears to be a lawful command on the surface, many citizens, because
    of their respect for what only appears to be a law, are cunningly coerced into waiving their
    rights, due to ignorance." (Paraphrased)

  24. #24
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    a fanny pack hanging on a book shelf out of reach wouldn't scream gun to a kid though.


    there is no such thing as out of reach to a curious kid!!!

    your only way to go, is locked up,,, or strapped on!

    think of the children..
    EMNofSeattle wrote: Your idea of freedom terrifies me. So you are actually right. I am perfectly happy with what you call tyranny.....

    “If ever a time should come, when vain and aspiring men shall possess the highest seats in Government, our country will stand in need of its experienced patriots to prevent its ruin.”

    Stand up for your Rights,, They have no authority on their own...

    All power is inherent in the people,
    it is their right and duty to be at all times ARMED!

  25. #25
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    Logansrun + on the movie

    As for carrying around the kids, you don't state which state you are in ... that would help if you were to include that in your profile as a lot of laws are very state specific ... but you mention Topeka ... if Kansas, I would think that the judge would be more inclined to knock down any issues your soon-to-be-ex would have about the gun and the kids. You don't have to tell the ex it is because of the frick and frack foolishness. You also don't mention if you have a Concealed Carry license, but if you do, carry openly in the residence, and carry concealed everywhere else. Also, 5 is not too young to start exposing the kids to guns and gun safety. You could get the Eddy Eagle video and let them watch it ... when they can repeat it word for word, then you know they are ready for the next step Start them young, teach them right and tell the ex to 'take a hike' as this is your decision, not hers. As long as the state laws support gun ownership and the exercise of your 2A, then your ex has no leg to stand on when you are operating within the law.

    Also, as for the apartment changing management/ownership, unless they notified you in writing of a change in the lease contract, the original contract you signed is in effect. You should notify the management that they are in violation of their contract with you re: the background checks. Then, go talk to your friendly DA if they have a program similar to the Tenant Dispute Program that many large cities have in which the tenant files a complaint with the DA, pays the rent at the DA's office until the landlord remedies the problem. If not, go the small claims route and ask for your rent back as remedy for breach of contract.

    Just in case it makes a diff, I am a woman :celebrate
    cheers - okboomer
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    Exercising my 2A Rights does NOT make me a CRIMINAL! Infringing on the exercise of those rights makes YOU one!

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