Dating with a gun

Kathy England · Jun 14, 2010

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The "girlfriend with a gun" thread brought this to mind. I know there aren't many of us girls around this board, but I am interested in hearing from the guys as well.

I have carried in my purse for nearly as long as I can remember until a year or two ago, so when I was dating my suitor would never know that I was carrying. I now refuse to to purse carry 99% of the time because I think its dangerous. Anyone heard of purse snatching?

Now that I am recently single, I find myself debating about how to carry when out on a date. (Notice, I say 'how' not 'if.'

) I'm not concerned about protecting myself from my date (though a woman's intuition isn't 100% accurate) just how to go about doing something I always do anyway.

OC advantage:
-He knows I'm armed and he better behave.
-If I do need it, its easily available.
-Weeds out the Brady nuts right away.

OC disadvantage:
-It might scare the crap out of some men...somewhat understandable; if he gets over that pretty quickly, he might still be a keeper.

-If he has nefarious intentions, he knows where to find and disarm me while I'm distracted. Also, he be more likely to be more in my personal space, therefore closer to my pistol.
-Being asked to leave an establishment that my date has chosen.

CC advantage:
-Won't scare the crap out of the poor guy, who might be a bit nervous on a first date anyway...especially with me, but that's another story.

-Still pretty easily accessible if needed.
-We won't be asked to leave due to a weapon.

CC disadvantage:
-I have to be careful about exactly where he can put his hands. I'm not talking about the usual spots...I usually cc in the small of my back and men often use this spot as a way to "guide" ladies. Generally, I like this move, but if its concealed, it should be concealed and I don't want his hands on my weapon...its mine!

-I can't wear some of my more attractive (tighter) tops or I'll "print" big time.
-If he has nefarious intentions, he still might know where to find and disarm me while I'm distracted...again, in my personal space and all.

I'm sure I've thought of others that I'm not remembering, but that's all I'm coming up with at the moment. So, lets hear you opinions!

Prophet · Jun 14, 2010

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Good question and one I have dealt with as well. Personally, I just OC and the reaction that my date has with it is a good indicator about the kind of person they are. If they freak out and refuse to go theres one anti I don't have to waste my time on. If they accept it but nag about me concealing it then they are pretty much nags and want everything their own way and I'd rather not waste my time. If they're cool with it then awesome...game on and I can go about learning more about this cool chick. And finally if they turn a hip and are OC'ing too (or CC'ing) then well...things will progress...nicely

But a girl carrying, to me, is like one who can drive a stick shift, shoot pool, drink bourbon or smoke cigars. A whole package of awesome.

Prophet · Jun 14, 2010

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Kathy England wrote:

-I can't wear some of my more attractive (tighter) tops or I'll "print" big time.

Isn't that kind of the point

Kathy England · Jun 14, 2010

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Prophet wrote:

Kathy England wrote:

-I can't wear some of my more attractive (tighter) tops or I'll "print" big time.

Click to expand...

Isn't that kind of the point

Not that kind of printing, silly boy! If I'm carrying concealed, I don't want my weapon to print. :lol:

Now, if other things happen to be a little more visible and, uh, attractive, that's another story all together!

flagellum · Jun 14, 2010

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This is an interesting question, and I think it can apply to males too. I figure when I meet a girl I would rather be CC'ing, as the risk of scaring her with an OC gun might be too great. God knows I don't need to lessen my odds any more that they are... :?

Anyhow that way I can test the waters on how she feels about guns in general before I tell her that I am carrying one. Something tells me that most girls wouldn't be pleasantly suprised to find a pistol in a romantic situation, but then again, some might... I don't know.

Reedster1 · Jun 14, 2010

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jpa · Jun 14, 2010

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Do you have a pocket gun like a P32 or something small you could conceal easier without it being noticed during the "end of date pat down"?

I had a girl that I used to hook up with on a pretty regular basis, while wearing a J-frame in an ankle holster. I just took the holster off at the same time I took off my shoes and pants and wrapped it inside my pants. Once we went out, Ihad it in my pocket and she bumped into it and asked what I had there. I told her it was my gun and her eyes almost popped out of her head. For all the times we were together, she never knew I carried a gun.

DVC · Jun 14, 2010

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From the guy standpoint:

I'm fine with a lady carrying when we go out, as long as the placement doesn't interfere with our activities (imagine one wearing at 3 O'clock, the other at 9, then getting them hung up while dancing -- that would be more embarrassing than locking braces).

Unless it's a shooting date, hike, etc, I would just as soon not see the pistol -- it doesn't cut it as a fashion accessory, any more than wearing a political campaign button. In the field, wear your favorite rig and I'm happy.

I don't like SOB carry -- it's dangerous to stick a lump of steel over the base of the spine.

I want to be told that my date is CCW, and where, so that I adjust where I touch her accordingly. The last thing that I want to do is get hung up in her pistol, make her print, etc. If I know she's carrying at 5 O'clock, I can put my hand OVER the pistol, instead of ON it, or keep my hands away from it altogether. I can also keep an eye for printing, clothing hung up, etc.

DVC · Jun 14, 2010

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flagellum wrote:

This is an interesting question, and I think it can apply to males too. I figure when I meet a girl I would rather be CC'ing, as the risk of scaring her with an OC gun might be too great.

When I met the lady I'm seeing currently, it was a surprised and I was carrying my GSP in a shoulder rig under an Aloha shirt (the loud pattern disrupts the print of the pistol). Fortunately, our mutual friend who was with her had mentioned that I carry, so that actually became a minor mystery for her to figure out where (she did, rapidly).

However, if I were going out for the first time with someone who didn't know, and who I wanted to get the best impression of me, I think I would want the smallest pistol possible, and hope she doesn't notice it. I have a Colt Junior .25 in a wallet holster, though one of those itty-bitty .22 revolvers is smaller and can be a better choice. Shot placement becomes critical, however the surprise factor is increased so I can get closer if I ever need it.

Nevada carrier · Jun 14, 2010

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For a woman to go out on a date dressed in a Jessica Rabbit style evening gown with a small pistol in her garter would be just plain sexy.

Kathy England · Jun 14, 2010

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jpa wrote:

Do you have a pocket gun like a P32 or something small you could conceal easier without it being noticed during the "end of date pat down"?

I had a girl that I used to hook up with on a pretty regular basis, while wearing a J-frame in an ankle holster. I just took the holster off at the same time I took off my shoes and pants and wrapped it inside my pants. Once we went out, Ihad it in my pocket and she bumped into it and asked what I had there. I told her it was my gun and her eyes almost popped out of her head. For all the times we were together, she never knew I carried a gun.

LOL I don't...funny thing is that I made a pocket/boot holster for my ex's little pocket pistol. I use to carry it in my boot when other types of carry didn't work for me...I almost never go without my boots. Somehow, I'm thinking that calling him and asking to borrow it for a date wouldn't go over well.

I don't need to be spending anymore money on pistols at the moment or I would get one. I loved that little one with the boot holster.

And as far as the "end of date pat down," if I know him well enoug,h to get naked with him, I know him well enough to show off my weapon.

Long ago, when I was dating in college I used to carry my little .38 revolver in a makeup bag. The man I eventually married once told me that he always wondered why I carried that makeup bag everywhere, since I didn't even wear makeup...never occurred to him that it was a pistol. :lol:

Kathy England · Jun 14, 2010

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Nevada carrier wrote:

For a woman to go out on a date dressed in a Jessica Rabbit style evening gown with a small pistol in her garter would be just plain sexy.

I'm not into girls, but even I might date Jessica Rabbit with a garter pistol.

Anvil · Jun 14, 2010

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The obvious thing to do is spend time at some of the local ranges, you may meet the person of your dreams and know you have a common interest in shooting.

I have always carried, first date or tenth date. I remember I took a young lady out for the evening, she did nothing but talk about her revolver that she always carried. I asked her if I could see it as I'm not that familiar with guns.( A little white lie I told).She said her revolver needed repairs and was at the shop.
I guess she wasn't that impressed with me,maybe because I didn't give her the reaction she wanted about her gun. I guess I wasn't impressed with her, she never knew I had my Stainless Steel Randall 45 tucked in my waist.

The point here is, be open about your need to have your pistol with you.Start off with that fact that you like guns, if the other person has an attraction to you, I think things will work out.

TyNV · Jun 14, 2010

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Anvil wrote

The point here is, be open about your need to have your pistol with you.Start off with that fact that you like guns, if the other person has an attraction to you, I think things will work out.

I have to agree.

calmp9 · Jun 15, 2010

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Kathy England wrote:

The "girlfriend with a gun" thread brought this to mind. I know there aren't many of us girls around this board, but I am interested in hearing from the guys as well.

I have carried in my purse for nearly as long as I can remember until a year or two ago, so when I was dating my suitor would never know that I was carrying. I now refuse to to purse carry 99% of the time because I think its dangerous. Anyone heard of purse snatching?

Now that I am recently single, I find myself debating about how to carry when out on a date. (Notice, I say 'how' not 'if.' ) I'm not concerned about protecting myself from my date (though a woman's intuition isn't 100% accurate) just how to go about doing something I always do anyway.

OC advantage:
-He knows I'm armed and he better behave.
-If I do need it, its easily available.
-Weeds out the Brady nuts right away.

OC disadvantage:
-It might scare the crap out of some men...somewhat understandable; if he gets over that pretty quickly, he might still be a keeper.
-If he has nefarious intentions, he knows where to find and disarm me while I'm distracted. Also, he be more likely to be more in my personal space, therefore closer to my pistol.
-Being asked to leave an establishment that my date has chosen.

CC advantage:
-Won't scare the crap out of the poor guy, who might be a bit nervous on a first date anyway...especially with me, but that's another story.
-Still pretty easily accessible if needed.
-We won't be asked to leave due to a weapon.

CC disadvantage:
-I have to be careful about exactly where he can put his hands. I'm not talking about the usual spots...I usually cc in the small of my back and men often use this spot as a way to "guide" ladies. Generally, I like this move, but if its concealed, it should be concealed and I don't want his hands on my weapon...its mine!
-I can't wear some of my more attractive (tighter) tops or I'll "print" big time.
-If he has nefarious intentions, he still might know where to find and disarm me while I'm distracted...again, in my personal space and all.

I'm sure I've thought of others that I'm not remembering, but that's all I'm coming up with at the moment. So, lets hear you opinions!

I think it's quite simple.

Just conceal carry like you normally would. Prevent your date from touching your firearm like you would anyone else. If your date happens to find out, he finds out. If he accepts the fact that you carry a firearm, he may get a second date. If not, tell him to kick rocks!!!

Citizen · Jun 15, 2010

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I'm definitely in favor of women with guns.

If she is unsure how her date might react to an OCd gun, she could always opt for purse-carry the first couple of dates (if she has a CCW license, of course) just on the date.

Then, maybe she finds an opportunity to drop it into the conversation. "Oh, see that man over there. It looks like he maybe hasa gun under his shirt. I get so tired of carrying in my purse. Where do you carry yours, Steve?"

If a woman offered to leave the tip, and rooted around in her purse for a second, then flopped a9mm or .38 on the table so she could dig deeper, I'd be in heaven.

But, if she flopped a .44 on the table, I'd be gone.

Kathy England · Jun 16, 2010

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Citizen wrote:

I'm definitely in favor of women with guns...If a woman offered to leave the tip, and rooted around in her purse for a second, then flopped a9mm or .38 on the table so she could dig deeper, I'd be in heaven.

But, if she flopped a .44 on the table, I'd be gone.

So, I carry a .40 cal Glock....what do you do then?

A little afraid hers might be bigger than yours? Size isn't everything, ya know.

Kathy England · Jun 16, 2010

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I'm hearing some good ideas. I think I'll have to take it on a case by case basis, depending on how much interaction we've had before going out. Men that I've been around more than a time or two will likely know that I like to play with guns and carry in some form most, if not all the time.

Any of my friends that "set me up" will likely "warn" any potential dates that I carry...among other warnings.

For some reason I have a tendency to intimidate men sometimes. <shrug> don't know why. :lol:

I kinda figure that any man that's not intimidated by me and/or my gun is either a good start or a serial killer. Now the question is how to tell those two apart!

I did have a date a few weeks ago that put his hand on my pistol (SOB carry) before I realized he was reaching. He felt something and asked what it was. Once I told him it was my Glock, he seemed put off a bit and didn't call again after that date. I'll have to pick a better date next time!

Anvil · Jun 16, 2010

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Kathy England wrote:

For some reason I have a tendency to intimidate men sometimes. <shrug> don't know why. :lol:

I kinda figure that any man that's not intimidated by me and/or my gun is either a good start or a serial killer. Now the question is how to tell those two apart!

Now I'm intrigued, not intimidated. You have a tendency to intimidate men.Maybe the man that last placed his hand on your Glock ( is that what we call them these days)wasn't put off by the gun, but something else that goes a little deeper.You just down right scared him.
He may have been thinking that you were undercover.

I do like woman that shoot and carry and do it for themselves not their spouse.You are independent and that may scare a guy or two away from you.Then I say they were the wrong guy for you.There are plenty of men out there looking for some one like you.

By the way, I have little objection to SOB carry, other than I can't see if anyone behind is going to grab the gun.
Some will warn you about breaking your back, that can happen without a SOB carry.The most you'd probably get from a fall is a bruise.

I still believe you should be up front, that way when the next guy reaches his arm around you and touches your "Glock" he won't have to ask what it was.

sslade6751 · Jun 16, 2010

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Kathy England wrote:

So, I carry a .40 cal Glock....what do you do then? A little afraid hers might be bigger than yours? Size isn't everything, ya know.

I carry my glock 23 .40 cal with me with a supertuck IWB holder for a guy it is a real comfortable way to carry all though one of the other gun boards that the owner of crossbreed owns has a whole thread on women wearing the crossbreed supertuck

all though the jessica rabbit with a gun on the garter belt image is interesting

Dating with a gun

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