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Thread: Friends/Family AGAINST OC!

  1. #1
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    Friends/Family AGAINST OC!

    Sounds insane doesnt it? Well turns out my friends and even my family are anti oc.
    The more time goes by, the more I'm beginning to realize this. My own dad told me a few days ago, "only cowards carry a gun". Honestly, i was both shocked, and a bit disgusted. Especially since i was carrying when he said that. My friends also say similar things, and the rest of my family are against me carrying, saying things like "you'll never shoot anyone" and "the only people who carry guns are the people that cant fight for themselves".
    Honestly its a little discouraging. In a way it makes me want to just leave my piece at home, or in the car. Me and my girlfriend both oc. We dress clean, behave appropriately, nothing to give the idea that we are doing it to be "punks" or for show. We do it to exercise our 2nd amendment rights, and if the situation ever came up, we would be able to protect ourselves, and have the means to do so.

    In saying that, I'm curious to know how everyone's family and friends treat you as an OC'er. Do they support you?
    What could you say to anti oc people to get them to understand where you are coming from?

  2. #2
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    Honestly it was rough at first. Friends and family have to be eduma-cated just like the rest of the sheeple. Hang in there, eventually they won't even notice, and that's the point after all, isn't it?

  3. #3
    Regular Member GF's Avatar
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    Honestly its a little discouraging. In a way it makes me want to just leave my piece at home, or in the car.


    Just yesterday I was in a rush and forgot to bring my firearm and I realized this once I was in my garage getting into my car, but I thought that my girlfriend had hers so I didn't worry about it. Once I found out that she had forgot hers also I felt REALLY uneasy. That was the first time that has happened.

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    Founder's Club Member ixtow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by >meso.40< View Post
    "only cowards carry a gun".
    This one just makes no sense at all. There isn't even a form of dis-logic to found it. I would seriously consider Baker Act-ing someone this messed up.

    Quote Originally Posted by >meso.40< View Post
    "you'll never shoot anyone"
    I think we all hope this is true... Does anyone who owns a gun WANT to shoot somebody? I've never met a gun-owner who did...

    Quote Originally Posted by >meso.40< View Post
    "the only people who carry guns are the people that cant fight for themselves"
    Uhm, EXACTLY! Ever get into a fistfight with a guy who has a knife or a baseball bat? You LOSE. Fighting is for the small-minded who's ego and hormones are bigger than their brains.

  5. #5
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    Yeah i agree. Doesnt make any sense to me the way people think.

    A few days ago i didnt carry my pistol, just because i was in a hurry.
    IT was weird not having it, didnt feel natural.

    Ive tried to teach them all about oc, but they dont listen.
    And statistically cars, cigarettes, and many many more things cause more deaths per year than guns do.

  6. #6
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    While it may have discouraged you a little, you need to think about it as nothing more than a personal decision.

    There are many good reasons to OC as well as many motivations to do so. Not all of the motivations are positive, but that exist with anything. You need to look internally at your own motivations and move forward with what ever suits you the best.

    There is no real surprise to your family being anti-OC, it is very common. Surveys and statistics are often skewed to the desired outcome, however, almost all of them range in the 41-52% of people polled are actually against OC. I think it is pretty safe to say that about 50% are in fact against it. When the polls are done on firearm owners, specifically men the numbers are much more supportive, however there is still about a 30% against it number. If you couple that knowledge with the percentages of persons owning guns and the anti-gun crowd, your going to have about 50% of folks.

    What does that mean? It means a lot of folks are nervous about it and have had little to no exposure to it. I also tend to think myself that the issue many have with OC is the reality of their own lack of situational awareness. When they have been standing near by you for several minutes and they finally notice the firearm, it panics them as they suddenly realize how clueless they were and you could in fact have done anything you wanted and they would have been defenseless. That scares the pants off of some folks and as long as they are allowed to remain aloof they are happy.

    I am not going to express an opinion on your fathers words, I do not know him and I would be insulting in my choice of words. You nor he can move at 800+ feet per second, and machismo is not a part of carrying a firearm. I have to wonder what kind of a man he thinks he is to have raised a coward (I BTW in no way think such a thing about you), he must have some real self esteem issues.

    I think the most important thing for you to focus on is simply that it is your choice, one with a huge responsibility tied to it and some folks can not handle such responsibilities and instead of just admitting as much, they hide behind the criticisms of those whom do step up and take responsibility for themselves. I mean that really s what the cry of the anti-gun crowd is, we do not want to be responsible for our own security, that is what cops are for, you hear it all the time.

    Congrats on taking the step forward and being responsible for yourself and family, it is not a popularity contest, its a lot of work. If they never grow to understand, it is not your fault and if you alter your methods for carry and go concealed, you will not be any less of a man or responsible citizen, you may just grow weary of the BS they spout and it is easier to avoid it.

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    well of course, when someone has a gun or a bomb or something, you are supposed to tackle them, or talk your way out of it. It just makes sense.

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    Quote Originally Posted by LMTD View Post
    While it may have discouraged you a little, you need to think about it as nothing more than a personal decision.

    There are many good reasons to OC as well as many motivations to do so. Not all of the motivations are positive, but that exist with anything. You need to look internally at your own motivations and move forward with what ever suits you the best.

    There is no real surprise to your family being anti-OC, it is very common. Surveys and statistics are often skewed to the desired outcome, however, almost all of them range in the 41-52% of people polled are actually against OC. I think it is pretty safe to say that about 50% are in fact against it. When the polls are done on firearm owners, specifically men the numbers are much more supportive, however there is still about a 30% against it number. If you couple that knowledge with the percentages of persons owning guns and the anti-gun crowd, your going to have about 50% of folks.

    What does that mean? It means a lot of folks are nervous about it and have had little to no exposure to it. I also tend to think myself that the issue many have with OC is the reality of their own lack of situational awareness. When they have been standing near by you for several minutes and they finally notice the firearm, it panics them as they suddenly realize how clueless they were and you could in fact have done anything you wanted and they would have been defenseless. That scares the pants off of some folks and as long as they are allowed to remain aloof they are happy.

    I am not going to express an opinion on your fathers words, I do not know him and I would be insulting in my choice of words. You nor he can move at 800+ feet per second, and machismo is not a part of carrying a firearm. I have to wonder what kind of a man he thinks he is to have raised a coward (I BTW in no way think such a thing about you), he must have some real self esteem issues.

    I think the most important thing for you to focus on is simply that it is your choice, one with a huge responsibility tied to it and some folks can not handle such responsibilities and instead of just admitting as much, they hide behind the criticisms of those whom do step up and take responsibility for themselves. I mean that really s what the cry of the anti-gun crowd is, we do not want to be responsible for our own security, that is what cops are for, you hear it all the time.

    Congrats on taking the step forward and being responsible for yourself and family, it is not a popularity contest, its a lot of work. If they never grow to understand, it is not your fault and if you alter your methods for carry and go concealed, you will not be any less of a man or responsible citizen, you may just grow weary of the BS they spout and it is easier to avoid it.

    Well said, and thank you.
    He is one of those guys that thinks people carry guns to intimidate, or scare, or to simply get attention.
    I explained to him the benefits of it.
    MY favorite saying is, "its better to have it and not need it, then need it and not have it". And thats exactly what i tell ever anti carry person. Not one has come up with a decent comeback to that, and that is because it is true.

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    Regular Member mFonz77's Avatar
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    Couldn't agree more (with the responses). A few random points of my own:

    -I've just recently developed some knee issues. Bad to the point I can't play basketball anymore without a brace (park basketball, not ever "hardcore" competitive ball). Even if I *were* a martial arts master, I would have no confidence in my ability to kick/run etc, which one reason I carry.

    -The whole point of a "grownup fight" should be a) to avoid them if at all possible and if it's GONNA happen, to WIN. I will try to find the link, but there is a good blog of someone who does consulting for Hollywood about knife fighting. Hollywood, as you all know, has their own romanticized version of deadly encounters which usually involve someone shooting the tire out of a car or using a bullet to cut a rope holding up a chandelier, or using a knife to cut someone's achillies heel so he lives but can't attack any more. The consultant, in his post, basically called a HUGE BS on all of this. The purpose of any "real" fight is to WIN. For most of us who carry that means shots to center mass until the threat is stopped. For a knife, made the comment that in a real "knife fight" the combatants do not dance around trying to score strategic hits until one gets too fatigued. No, a real one is a lot quicker and a lot more brutal. I would absolutely beleive that a hand-to-hand fight would be the same. I would imagine that two people aren't going to dance around trying to land Bruce Lee roundhouses; they're going to go for the eyes, "boys," and throat until one literally cannot continue to fight.

    So the comment that carrying a gun is only for people who can't fight for themselves is, in this context, simply idiotic (not your dad, just the comment).

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    we all get those comments. its pretty simple though. any man can use his hands and feet to defend himself against another man. however very few can fend of 3 or more armed attackers without some help ;-) people who say you shouldnt carry are just affraid of the gun itself and have this horrible notion that anyone who carries is a violent criminal psychopath with the intent to harm people. we can educate, but its an uphill battle . dont drop your resolve, keep carrying and eventually people will see :-)

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    If friends and family are against open carry, then inform them they don't have to do it. Tell them you're solely responsible for your own protection, not the police or anyone else, and if you want to open carry, then, by damn, you're going to open carry. End of discussion.

    When asked, if asked, why I open carry, I tell people, "Because I can."

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    To the OP ,

    Google Suzanna Hupp . She lost both parents the same day .

    Google Lane Bryant killing in Northern Illinois.

    If those 2 stories aren't enough to change minds , then they can't be changed. Let your family members listen to Suzanna's story.

    Don't let your family members talk you out of carrying.

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    Thanks for the advice, i googled both, and wow. Makes me wonder why EVERYONE doesnt carry.

    My brother in law let his parents talk him out of carrying, so my sister now carries his sig 2022 in her purse. Or if its a small purse occasion its her Desert Eagle Micro Eagle. (personally i hate the gun, but she shoots it EXTREMELY well).
    But im not going to stop carrying for ANYONE. I guess if people want to not be able to protect themselves, thats their problem.

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    I understand where you're coming from. My Father is against me carrying, owning, or anything with firearms. He tells me to leave the firearms at home when I leave (why would I own one if I do not bring it with me?).

    Give it time, if they truly love you they will accept you. I think I am the only conservative in my family, and I'm slowly converting them .

    Keep at it.

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    You are not a coward. A coward would cave into the intense pressure rather than ride it out. Like an earlier poster mentioned. Eventually they will get used to it and not even notice. My advice is to NOT argue, just ignore them. Debating only makes them dig in their heels.

    EVENTUALLY, (i.e. sooner or later), you and family/friends can coexist peacefully out together in public while you are carrying and then they will get educated by the many positive & supportive comments (not to mention special treatment) you will undoubtedly receive from total strangers. Just give it time. You really can't go wrong so long as you keep up your good behavior, continue to be well dressed/groomed, and exude confidence.

    Good luck!
    Last edited by OC4me; 07-09-2010 at 12:01 PM.

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    Excellent!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by mFonz77 View Post
    excellent information. this is very accurate and great information. It helps to develope and be in tune with other peoples feelings and emotions

  18. #18
    Regular Member The Big Guy's Avatar
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    Coward?

    When I first began to open carry it was not an easy decision to make. I wanted the ability to protect my family and myself. I find as I get older and my health deteriorates the option of stand and fight or run are no longer available to me. Still, I was very apprehensive about OC as I was AFFRAID of being open to trouble with the police and people in general. When I was younger I was tall and strong and fast, and as all young people think, I must have been indistructable. With age comes wisdom because looking back, even in those days I was no match for a ball bat or a bullet. Even knowing this I was still AFFRAID to carry. Now I do carry, and I am AFFRAID I might have to some day use my firearm in defense of self or family. If you equate fear with Cowardice then you have to count me as one of the worlds biggest cowards. Years ago I was told by and old salt, 30 years in the navy, WWII, Korea and Viet Nam, a man who owned more medals than I could count, that the true meaning of bravery was being so scared that you thought you would wet yourself and despite that fear, you do what you have to do. He told me that people who were never affraid are not brave, but insane. Carrying a firearm for protection of self, family and community is not cowardice but shows good positive judgement. A determination to be prepared. To not think ahead and prepare are signs of foolishness, not bravery. Don't allow your fathers words to shame you into doing something your guts tell you is right. Feel sorry for him for he is the one who is a coward as he refuses to see what is goin on around him.


    TBG

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    I have a ton of snarky replies for jerks I don't know

    but none for ppl I know/care about. I simply say it's my right just like it's your right not to carry.

    I once asked them why wear a seatbelt, are they expecting to crash? but it went over their heads.

    eventually ppl get used to it.

  20. #20
    Regular Member Machoduck's Avatar
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    &gt;meso.40&lt; - Welcome to OCDO. How do you pronounce your screen name? I can't even punctuate it, let alone pronounce it.

    About your dad's viewpoint regarding open carry: It could be as simple as watching too much television. All of us get way too much misinformation from TV by osmosis, if not by intentional misleading. Is he liberal (new definition), progressive, or collectivist? Folks of that persuasion usually adhere to what I call "The Unwritten Dress Code for the Mind." The majority of people, in my estimation want to belong to some group or another. The left has turned the creation of that desire into an art form. I watched it happen with my own dad. As my ability to defeat leftist arguments grew I started to make some headway but a stroke ended that. Alas. It would be a really neat thing to turn your dad's thinking around to a more common sense approach.

    MD

  21. #21
    Regular Member March Hare's Avatar
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    My brother and his wife came to visit from Kalifornia recently.
    When she saw that I carry a gun she asked 'why do you carry that thing, are you trying to compensate for something?'

    I said that I was, for not being young, strong and fast.
    She gave me a hard time about that so I asked her to picture a scenario:

    She's walking down a street and a big guy approaches her with obvious bad intentions, could she defend herself?
    (She's 5'2'' and about 115 pounds)
    She thought about it and admitted that she probably couldn't.

    I handed her my holstered CZ-82 and asked if she thought the odds would be better in her favor if she had and knew how to use it, she thought about it and said probably, but she's afraid of the gun. (She almost dropped it)

    We all went out and did some shooting and I taught her how to safely handle, load and fire several different guns. She LOVED it!
    I almost lost that CZ to her, it fit her hand so well...

    She's still not completely convinced about carrying, but she's light years closer now.

    Sometimes it just takes getting someone to look at a thing from a slightly different point of view, if you can do that you just might win them over.

    Good luck!

    -MH

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    Wink

    well said MH, some people are just ignorant.
    My nephews came to visit today, and the oldest one told me his grandpa says im "cocky" for carrying a gun in public. I was literally like what the hell? He thinks anyone who carries a gun is cocky and thinks they are "all that and a bag of skittles". The guy is an ass hat, at best. I was pretty dumbfounded, since ive seen him carry a gun while fishing and whatnot. And he carries a big ass knife.

    Guess that all Marines, Army, Airforce, police, security etc etc are all a bunch of cocky guys/girls.
    Its too bad we dont have unarmed police, like the brits.

  23. #23
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    you ever notice how the line against something always ends up being longer than the line for?

  24. #24
    Moderator / Administrator Grapeshot's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GF View Post
    Honestly its a little discouraging. In a way it makes me want to just leave my piece at home, or in the car.


    Just yesterday I was in a rush and forgot to bring my firearm and I realized this once I was in my garage getting into my car
    , but I thought that my girlfriend had hers so I didn't worry about it. Once I found out that she had forgot hers also I felt REALLY uneasy. That was the first time that has happened.
    That is why every vehicle has a reverse gear - use it in such circumstances.
    You will not rise to the occasion; you will fall back on your level of training. Archilochus, 650 BC

    Old and treacherous will beat young and skilled every time. Yata hey.

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    Quote Originally Posted by jayspapa View Post
    To the OP ,

    Google Suzanna Hupp . She lost both parents the same day .

    Google Lane Bryant killing in Northern Illinois.

    If those 2 stories aren't enough to change minds , then they can't be changed. Let your family members listen to Suzanna's story.

    Don't let your family members talk you out of carrying.
    That story alone should do it.

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