Agent19: as to the presence of the natives - we're hiding out under the genetic dominance of WhiteMan - I'm told my great-grandmother was Chickasaw, though there is no official confirmation of exactly what kind of "native" she was. She make wonderful black-walnut poun'cake, though.
As to the relative deficiencies of Northern Va.: I was born and raised in Alexandria. My great-uncle was the chief of PO-lice, and "Remember the Titans" was about my graduating class (I know, I look much older than that - it's the drugs). But I showed up there about ten years after the beginning of the influx of foreigners (people from Delaware, NY, NJ, Mass., etc. who appeared to work for the U.S. during and after the Great War). Alexandria was still a small, southern town when I was a kid. The cultural differences that have resulted from the recent waves of immigration (again, mostly from the N.E.) have changed things drastically. As I see it, the difference is between the attitude that the State is in power and must compel its citizens to perform as it wishes, as against the belief that the State is us, and if we want to live together, we have to be socially responsible and voluntarily conform ourselves to the rules we have agreed upon through our representatives.
The Yankees tend to believe that "all men are sinners", that they are unrecoverable, and will always be evil, and therefore, some evil must be tolerated - but we'll come down on anyone who goes over a certain line (or whom we just don't like) like a ton of bricks. It's a system where social status is more important than law, because that's what determines where the line is. Doctors have a different line than do garbagemen. Voluntary compliance with the law is a foreign concept to them; like the "Pirate's Code", the law is "sorta like, guidelines." These systems are based on an ideal of self-indulgence and social control is based primarily on shame, fear, and guilt.
People from Virginia and South Carolina believe that man is recoverable, that sin is not the essence of the human condition, and that salvation comes through more than belief in an intellectual system of theology or acknowledgement of the status of a religious leader or organization. Hence, it is up to each of us to "play by the rules"; we try to be polite and civil, and to voluntarily comply with the law. That's the ideal, at least, many of us still roll through stop signs. We regard the law as something that, as our own creation, exists independently of any of us as individuals, and applies equally to all of us as individuals. Since we believe in the application of the law in a serious way, we strongly reject the multiplicity of laws, especially those which have the effect of criminalizing otherwise lawful behavior, or which are simply trying to control behavior by compounding laws upon laws. This system is based on an ideal of social responsibility and social control is through individual self-control, self-discipline, and voluntary submission to agreed-upon legislation.
So, while I am in total sympathy with the OP, and earnestly wish him well, I do hope that he will leave Connecticut and New Hampshire behind in every respect, understand that he is moving to, what to him will be, a foreign country in which he will learn the local mores and become "one of us". The cultural disaster that is Northern Virginia is due to a conflict on a cultural level that I see as sort of a plague.