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Once upon a time in a land ...not too far away..A Ferry tale

peter nap

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Joined
Oct 16, 2007
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Once upon a time, there was an Ogre, but a kind and gentle Ogre, who was accused of scaring Billy Goat Gruff.

Since this happened in a public place with security cameras, the Ogre thought it a simple task to show he didn't do anything to Mr. Gruff, but call him an Old Goat.

Alas, the camera footage was looked at and then destroyed.

After a very long argument it was decided the Ogre was to write down his reasons he wasn't guilty of unlawful scaring and file it under the bridge by a certain date.

When that date came and the Ogre went to the bridge, no one was there so he left it as directed by bridge law.

The next morning the Harbor Masters assistant said it wasn't there even though the doors were still locked.

A handsome videographer said, "No problem, they have security cameras", so the handsome videographer filed an FOIA for the video.

Th next day, the Handsome Videographer got an urgent request for an extension by the Harbor Master saying....we don't know how to use the security system. We may have to bring the Smurf's that made it to view the footage.

The handsome Videographer said "There are legitimate reasons to exempt yourself from the law but being stoopid isn't one of them".

I'll read more of this Ferry tale tomorrow:lol:
 
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Blk97F150

Regular Member
Joined
Dec 21, 2010
Messages
1,179
Location
Virginia
OMG!! I think I'm gonna like this story!

Are you sure about the 'handsome Videographer' part though?? :uhoh:
 

Mr H

Regular Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Messages
286
Location
AA Co., Maryland, USA
Once upon a time, there was an Ogre, but a kind and gentle Ogre, who was accused of scaring Billy Goat Gruff.

Since this happened in a public place with security cameras, the Ogre thought it a simple task to show he didn't do anything to Mr. Gruff, but call him an Old Goat.

Alas, the camera footage was looked at and then destroyed.

After a very long argument it was decided the Ogre was to write down his reasons he wasn't guilty of unlawful scaring and file it under the bridge by a certain date.

When that date came and the Ogre went to the bridge, no one was there so he left it as directed by bridge law.

The next morning the Harbor Masters assistant said it wasn't there even though the doors were still locked.

A handsome videographer said, "No problem, they have security cameras", so the handsome videographer filed an FOIA for the video.

Th next day, the Handsome Videographer got an urgent request for an extension by the Harbor Master saying....we don't know how to use the security system. We may have to bring the Smurf's that made it to view the footage.

The handsome Videographer said "There are legitimate reasons to exempt yourself from the law but being stoopid isn't one of them".

I'll read more of this Ferry tale tomorrow:lol:

No, Daddy!!! Read more!!
 

45acpForMe

Newbie
Joined
Nov 21, 2008
Messages
2,805
Location
Yorktown, Virginia, USA
Silly Rabbi

This story reminds me of an old breakfast cereal joke.

Three tridds lived in peace on one side of a bridge. A troll lived under the bridge and would kick any tridd that tried to cross to the greener field on the other side. A Rabbi walking towards the bridge saw each of the three tridds try to cross the bridge and each in turn got a good kick in the rear from the troll. Needing to cross the bridge the Rabbi braced himself and asked the troll if he could please cross the bridge. "Of course!", said the troll and the Rabi cautiously walked by the troll across the bridge. At the far side of the bridge the Rabbi turned around and asked the troll why he didn't kick him? The troll responded, "Silly Rabbi, kicks are for tridds!". :)

Now substitute "skid" for "tridd" above! :lol:
 

peter nap

Accomplished Advocate
Joined
Oct 16, 2007
Messages
13,551
Location
Valhalla
We need the next segment. This is good stuff.

OK, OK....but it has to be a short chapter. Busy week..

The handsome videographer didn't trust the Harbor Master or the Blue Meanies so he went on one of his frequent road trips with a very small magic memory device (MMD).

First, he looked at the bridge to make sure which entrance the Ogre had had his papers delivered to. (There is another character involved that is the representative of the Ogre, but more on him later).

The MMD showed this entrance:
d1-2.jpg


Then the Handsome Videographer looked for any security cameras that may have captured one of the Blue Meanies taking papers which of course would be a violation og Bridge Law 18.2-472.

According to the MMD, there are three but one is secret.

d3-1.jpg


d2-2.jpg


The handsome Videographer spoke to many people that day while the MMD heard all, Saw all and remembers all.

Later, he remembered a fellow hero he had met. This hero rode a Golden Wing and was an expert in Video Security systems.
After speaking to him he suggested the Videographer seek the Make and model of the security system so he could best pull the manufacturers manual.

With this information, we would be able to lift the curtain and cure the Harbor Master of the Stoopids.

The night before the Videographer was to cure the stoopids, he saw the Ogre at dinner.
The Ogre roared "I AM NOT KIND AND GENTLE, GET IT RIGHT".

OK,OK fussed the Videographer, the darned details are killing me.

So he now is getting the information for the Golden Wing Expert and telling everyone he had spoken to that the Ogre was not kind and gentle, he had to take a break and plant Sweet Potatoes though.

..........................More Next week

Special note:
This is being written with Dragon Speak that sometimes does strange things and I don't have time to correct them. Please be patient.
 
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Grapeshot

Legendary Warrior
Joined
May 21, 2006
Messages
35,317
Location
Valhalla
I too like this story. but wish that the chapters weren't so long. Think I will have to close my closet door, so the monsters won't get out when I'm asleep.

By the time the morrow comes, the new batch of troll juice should be ready for delivery - they get so excited when they see it coming - dancing their own, strange little jig.

Sleep tight 'n night night, I'll leave the hall light on.
 

DocDaddy

Regular Member
Joined
Feb 27, 2008
Messages
308
Location
Virginia Beach, Virginia, USA
Yaaaa! This is some great reading here on the shores of Kerplakistan (Actually, there really aren't shores here, but you get the point)! Can't wait for more on the "Representative of the Ogre", for he must be a great battle commander who will smite at the heart of the evil coalition! ;) Great fairy tale!
 
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