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Mother in law hates when I carry

bmmd321

Regular Member
Joined
Jul 21, 2011
Messages
25
Location
Hamden,CT
So I've had my permit for a few months now and purchased two firearms. Prior to carrying I read all the laws and statutes so I can make sure i was doing everything right. When I first started carrying my wife was nervous, now after a few months she understands a lot more of why I carry everywhere I go. Its a crazy world and living in the newhaven county the fourth most deadliest city in the USA, I would be stupid not too. Now my problem is her mom. Everytime she comes over or we stop by she's always asking why do you have that? She says you over react too much. I tell her its my right as a citizen to protect myself. She still rolls her eyes and questions me all the time. Now I respect her and don't want to upset my wife when I tell her to f*%k off, so how can I go about this? Some people are just blind to the truth. The truth is times are different and people are desperate, economy is bad people robbing stealing etc. I will not let my kids fall victim to someone elses actions, therefore I carry everywhere. Even in my home. My wife now gets upset cause I don't go over her moms house anymore, but im just trying to avoid the harrasment. Any advice???
 

PistolPackingMomma

Regular Member
Joined
Oct 1, 2011
Messages
1,884
Location
SC
Ask your MIL if she would rather you be able to defend your wife in a dangerous situation, or if she'd rather you not be able to...you could also tack on some witty comment about your gun being part of your insurance policy...

If she's rational and willing to listen, I would tell her "It's my decision, and I'd like you to respect that." If not, maybe your wife could make some progress with her.
 

bmmd321

Regular Member
Joined
Jul 21, 2011
Messages
25
Location
Hamden,CT
I conceal carry but maybe my shirt comes up and she sees it. It doesn't matter cause she know its on me. The day I leave it at home and im over eating dinner, is the day some idiot kicks in the door and who know what's next. I hate to think like that but it happens everyday. At least with my firearm I have a chance to defend myself and my family. She's just old school and thinks only bad things happen to only bad people. Maybe I'll keep trying to school her on everything and maybe one day she'll see things the way I do.
 

DocWalker

Regular Member
Joined
Jul 6, 2008
Messages
1,922
Location
Mountain Home, Idaho, USA
I would probably print out some articles of "good people" being victims to crime. Some killed or wonded just for being in the wrong place at the right time. Put together a little book of 10-15 articles were unarmed citizens where couldn't protect themselves. I would also put in 5-10 articles or news reports of armed citizens protecting themself or their family with positive outcomes.

Sit down and show them to her and ask her what group she would like to see her daughter and grandkids be attached to in the event something bad happens to good people.

You can find these stories on the internet, there are a lot of them.
 

Rich B

Regular Member
Joined
Oct 13, 2009
Messages
2,909
Location
North Branford, Connecticut, USA
I conceal carry but maybe my shirt comes up and she sees it. It doesn't matter cause she know its on me. The day I leave it at home and im over eating dinner, is the day some idiot kicks in the door and who know what's next. I hate to think like that but it happens everyday. At least with my firearm I have a chance to defend myself and my family. She's just old school and thinks only bad things happen to only bad people. Maybe I'll keep trying to school her on everything and maybe one day she'll see things the way I do.

Sounds like the only problem is that you need to work on your concealment. Out of sight, out of mind.

I doubt you are going to make her 'come around' by arguing with her.
 

skidmark

Campaign Veteran
Joined
Jan 15, 2007
Messages
10,444
Location
Valhalla
I'm going to second PistolPackingMomma. I'm also going to try not to make bad MIL jokes or references.

Your decision to carry is based on your resolve to protect yourself so that you can provide for your family, which at this point consists of your MIL's daughter. Your decision is also based on your resolve to protect your MIL's daughter. Anything your MIL says against those decisions seems to indicate that she cares less about you providing for and protecting her daughter than you do - but I wouldn't say that in so many words to her face unless you get a good head start.

The fact that you continue to carry when your MIL shows up seems to indicate a resolve to protect her when she is under your roof or your companion when out and about. Leastways that's how I would sell it.

I suggest you find a time when you can sit down with your MIL and explain these points without getting into any debate about 2A, or you being paranoid or not, or anything else. Then ask her if she wants you to stop caring about her daughter and her to the point of stripping away your ability to protect them. If she says Yes, she wants you to stop, just tell her that you are very sorry but morally and ethically choose not to do so in spite of her desires.

At that point the discussion is over, closed and cannot be brought up again.

She can choose not to let you protect her by not being around you. Otherwise, she's just going to have to put up with you caring more about her than she cares about herself.

Since she's probably not going to give up seeing her daughter, you get to go on protecting her even though it pisses her off. Be sure to let your wife know you are willing to endure that - it might earn you a bonus point.

If, on the other hand, your MIL "sees the light" and understands at least the basics of your reason(s) for carrying in order to protect her daughter and her, then you win. She does not have to be wildly enthusiastic about it, but she has to endure it wiht at least politeness if not good grace.

Hope this helps.

stay safe.
 

Badger Johnson

Regular Member
Joined
Jan 12, 2011
Messages
1,213
Location
USA
What about this?

Have some friends dress up like burglars and burst into your house with (toy) guns. Have them order your M-I-L to give them her valuables, etc. When your MIL looks at you, knowing you have a gun, just raise your hands palm up and shrug and say 'Oh, sorry, left it in the safe since you were coming over'.

Then, after she freaks, tell her it's just a joke.

When she finishes changing her underwear, she'll change her mind on you carrying for SD.
 

dogsandhogs

Regular Member
Joined
Apr 21, 2011
Messages
75
Location
Missouri
What about this?

Have some friends dress up like burglars and burst into your house with (toy) guns. Have them order your M-I-L to give them her valuables, etc. When your MIL looks at you, knowing you have a gun, just raise your hands palm up and shrug and say 'Oh, sorry, left it in the safe since you were coming over'.

Then, after she freaks, tell her it's just a joke.

When she finishes changing her underwear, she'll change her mind on you carrying for SD.

I would not recommend this. MIL may be a hypocrite like Diane Feinstein and be carrying concealed herself!
 

cocked&locked

Member
Joined
Apr 14, 2011
Messages
190
Location
PA
So I've had my permit for a few months now and purchased two firearms. Prior to carrying I read all the laws and statutes so I can make sure i was doing everything right. When I first started carrying my wife was nervous, now after a few months she understands a lot more of why I carry everywhere I go. Its a crazy world and living in the newhaven county the fourth most deadliest city in the USA, I would be stupid not too. Now my problem is her mom. Everytime she comes over or we stop by she's always asking why do you have that? She says you over react too much. I tell her its my right as a citizen to protect myself. She still rolls her eyes and questions me all the time. Now I respect her and don't want to upset my wife when I tell her to f*%k off, so how can I go about this? Some people are just blind to the truth. The truth is times are different and people are desperate, economy is bad people robbing stealing etc. I will not let my kids fall victim to someone elses actions, therefore I carry everywhere. Even in my home. My wife now gets upset cause I don't go over her moms house anymore, but im just trying to avoid the harrasment. Any advice???

Simple. Get yourself a new mother-in-law.
 

SIGguy229

Regular Member
Joined
Jul 23, 2007
Messages
349
Location
Stafford, VA, , Afghanistan
If your MIL is one of those people who thinks only bad things happen to bad people.....remind her of the Doctor whose wife and daughters were killed in their home. The wife and daughters were doing nothing except buying groceries when they were picked out of a crowd....followed....and terrorized. Remind her of that.
 

KIX

Regular Member
Joined
Jun 4, 2010
Messages
960
Location
, ,
I can get the audio, but have her listen to Joshua Komisarjevsky's confession. WVIT had the audio files for a bit. He said no matter what and how much they complied, in the end, they were going to die and Hayes made that clear.

At least if you carry, you have a fighting chance and it won't be int he perps hands.

Jonathan
 

KIX

Regular Member
Joined
Jun 4, 2010
Messages
960
Location
, ,
For the record, my ex mother in law hates it when I tag my son in pictures on FB when we are at the range. She truly CRINGES!

I love it.

Jonathan
 

GoldCoaster

Regular Member
Joined
Jun 24, 2008
Messages
646
Location
Stratford, Connecticut, USA
Dr Pettit

As mentioned before, I'm sure the poor doctor Pettit wishes he had the means to protect his family against those animals. He did all the right things that comes with money, moved to Cheshire, a pretty nice town in a nice part of the state. Not that near any "bad" towns/cities.

The problem with criminals are they don't say in their own towns - they like to rob people that actually have stuff so the head into the nicer parts and figure they can rob/murder with impunity.

It was only pure luck those bastards were caught at all and I can't think of a punishment suitable for them unless it's setting them on fire like they did to Dr Pettit's family.
 

jayspapa

Regular Member
Joined
Jul 27, 2008
Messages
313
Location
South end of the state, Illinois, USA
I can recommend 2 stories to show her....

1) Google the 2008 Lane Bryant killings

2) Google Suzanna Hupp and listen to her story of loosing her parents .

Both are stories of innocent people doing everyday things and in places most would assume to be reasonably safe.
 

MAC702

Campaign Veteran
Joined
Jul 31, 2011
Messages
6,331
Location
Nevada
Find a picture of a beautiful girl lying dead from a violent attack in a parking lot. The more gruesome, the better. Hand it to her and simply say that you will do everything in your power to keep her daughter from ending up like this.
 
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