Why are you carrying that firearm?

[gravedigger]

Why do you carry a gun?

Because when a criminal decides to shoot all of you unarmed people, he might still have a bullet left when he gets to me.

 

[ixtow]

you absolutely must tell that story lol

She came out of the blocks with some condescending anti-gun comment. I asked her what she could do, besides watch her children die, if I actually were the bad guy she accused me of being.

I think she was a bit more lucid than the average anti-gun wacko. The obvious logic sunk in immediately. It was like the tears shot out of her face. I've never seen someone cry like that before. It's usually something that you can see coming. Try to hold it back, and then comes the tears. This was instantaneous. The smirk of her original comment hadn't left her face yet. I just walked away. It was one of those clarity moments. She didn't say it with words, but you could hear it in your head: "I've been risking my children for an obviously bogus political agenda!" I'll never forget it, and I have terrible memory. The only thing I can compare it to, is watching a meth addict finally say they want to quit. But picture the whole event, from the first moment of addiction, to the first day of sobriety all happening in a split second. I've never witnessed a human mind work so fast and accurately...

I was extra surprised when she apologized for insulting me... I was so shocked I couldn't speak. I didn't say anything to her... I feel like an ass (notice, that's present tense), but I literally could not speak.

 

[waterfowl woody]

why do you carry a gun?
It's part of my life insurance policy

or the question
"what is that?"
It's a pace maker
"you have heart issues?"
no, I don't

 

[DangerClose]

or the question
"what is that?"
It's a pace maker
"you have heart issues?"
no, I don't

I do like that one along with the popular joke one:
"You carry a gun? What are you afraid of?"
"Nothing."

If the situation presents itself, I hope I remember something like this one that people have said:
"If I were a criminal wanting to hurt you, what could you do about it?"

 

[CommonMan101]

Why?

Of all the roles I've played in life Victim sucked the most. I wish not to repeat it.

 

[ixtow]

"If I were a criminal wanting to hurt you, what could you do about it?"

That, and variations of it, have been by far the most effective...

I like to throw in the "If I were the bad guy you accuse me of being, what could you do about it?" It debunks their backwards/presumptive insults, and how helpless they are at the same time...

Most of the anti's approach with something akin to "does your father know you're gay?" It is a loaded question that includes a false statement. Any response at all results in an admission of a falsehood. Well, unless you are gay... You get the idea. These sorts deserve the ugly responses.

I still like the women that tell me I have a small penis for carrying a gun:

Bitch on Wheels: "Carrying a gun is compensating for a..."
Me: "The barrel is 5 x 0.5 inches. If that's compensating, I've got a surprise for you (wink)."
or/and
Me: "Care to test the theory?"
or/and
Me: "There's a gas station bathroom right over there, I'm sure you're familiar with it..."

Then you wait about 10-30 seconds for her to realize what that means... Just one more reason to carry a recorder...

 

[Centerfire Citizen]

I still like the women that tell me I have a small penis for carrying a gun:

Bitch on Wheels: "Carrying a gun is compensating for a..."
Me: "The barrel is 5 x 0.5 inches. If that's compensating, I've got a surprise for you (wink)."
or/and
Me: "Care to test the theory?"
or/and
Me: "There's a gas station bathroom right over there, I'm sure you're familiar with it..."

Then you wait about 10-30 seconds for her to realize what that means... Just one more reason to carry a recorder...

That is hilarious, thats a nice "How I met your mother" story.

 

[ixtow]

That is hilarious, thats a nice "How I met your mother" story.

I wouldn't want someone like that to be mother to my children.

No mother is better than a slutty, dumb mother that won't protect her own kids...

The most disturbing part of it is the correlation of sex organs with weapons. Women learn from a young age to use sex as a weapon. What kind of relationship can you possibly have with someone like that? A Penis is a Gun? Think about it a bit, it's sick... Why would I want to be involved with someone that is so screwed up? Any doubt where all the dysfunctional families and broken homes come from?

The person who correlates sex with weapons, is a very, very, very sick person.

 

[Daylen]

I wouldn't want someone like that to be mother to my children.

No mother is better than a slutty, dumb mother that won't protect her own kids...

The most disturbing part of it is the correlation of sex organs with weapons. Women learn from a young age to use sex as a weapon. What kind of relationship can you possibly have with someone like that? A Penis is a Gun? Think about it a bit, it's sick... Why would I want to be involved with someone that is so screwed up? Any doubt where all the dysfunctional families and broken homes come from?

The person who correlates sex with weapons, is a very, very, very sick person.

Its a sperm gun! Like a water gun but more fun.

 

[Aubb]

thay ask why I carry a gun

I say,incase I come acroos something that needs killin.

 

[DocWalker]

Dam since I have a Vasectomy mine is more like a starter pistol.....I only shoot blanks. I would like to think of it as a starter rifle though.

 

[Steeler-gal]

Someone asked me if I was at all concerned about missing the person im aiming for and the bullet hitting a house or going in to a house? Esp. knowing that a bullet can travel a mile....

I looked at her and said

"but I never miss." []

 

[Steeler-gal]

Why are you carrying that firearm?

Because it doesn't have wheels and I don't want to drag it.

This was posted a LONG time ago but I love it.

 

[carracer]

Somewhere, I read a post from someone about penis compensation to the effect that he admitted his was certainly not large enough to defend himself with. However, if yours is, how wonderful it must be to be able to wield such an enormous member... and so on.

Wish I could find that post.

 

[SFCRetired]

I have only had one woman use that "penis compensation" line on me. My reply was, "Well, I admit that I ain't got much, but I'm proud of every foot of it!"

Have you ever watched a fish out of water gasping for oxygen? That's what she looked like until I got tired of watching her eyeballs bug out and walked away!

Yeah, I'll admit I'm a horrible, rude, crude, and socially unacceptable old man. Love every minute of it, too!!

 

[ixtow]

Yeah, I'll admit I'm a horrible, rude, crude, and socially unacceptable old man. Love every minute of it, too!!

No worries, some people don't deserve courtesy; like those who walk up to strangers and talk about business that is none of theirs...

 

[acmariner99]

If I really wanted to be a douche:

"Why are you carrying that?"
"Do I need a reason?"

 

[Fallschirjmäger]

"You mean the world to me and while I might give my life for yours, I'm not going to let you throw mine away." - said to the first wife before she finally 'got it.'

 

[ixtow]

Somewhere, I read a post from someone about penis compensation to the effect that he admitted his was certainly not large enough to defend himself with. However, if yours is, how wonderful it must be to be able to wield such an enormous member... and so on.

Wish I could find that post.

I believe it was Sonora Rebel... It involved the phrase 'squeel and go cross-eyed.'

 

[okboomer]

If I really wanted to be a douche:

"Why are you carrying that?"
"Do I need a reason?"

Actually, I see that as a quite reasonable response. Makes them have to come up with a reason while you are walking away :lol: