1245A Defender
Regular Member
What??
Is someone anti-GAY??? what that got to do with this???
Is someone anti-GAY??? what that got to do with this???
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Need some help: wife opposes me carrying
- Thread starter DaveT319
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SFCRetired
Regular Member
Think that was a disconnect between the brain and the fingers. Usually found in old codgers like me and some others I could name on here.
DaveT319
Regular Member
Damn you autocorrect! lol
Rusty Young Man
Regular Member
The (in-)conveniences of auto-correct.:lol:
Sometimes the only way to undo all that statist programming (being blasted from news media, schools, antis, etc.) is just to carry yourself.
We're in the business of desensitizing people to armed Law Abiding Citizens and inanimate objects which have proven themselves able to equalize the smallest-framed little old granny with the largest 350 lb berserker.
If nothing else, we "pro-gunners" are: pro-Liberty, pro-Rights, pro-gender equality, pro-race equality, etc.
Glad to hear progress is being made DaveT319.
Sometimes the only way to undo all that statist programming (being blasted from news media, schools, antis, etc.) is just to carry yourself.
We're in the business of desensitizing people to armed Law Abiding Citizens and inanimate objects which have proven themselves able to equalize the smallest-framed little old granny with the largest 350 lb berserker.
If nothing else, we "pro-gunners" are: pro-Liberty, pro-Rights, pro-gender equality, pro-race equality, etc.
Glad to hear progress is being made DaveT319.
stealthyeliminator
Regular Member
Not real advise but, maybe with some tweaking would be relatively similar to what I'd do...
Step one: Ask her for any reasonable objections she has to you carrying. (There will probably be none. Subsequent steps assume no reasonable objections)
Step two: Be adamant that carrying is important to you, for your family's benefit, that it is your responsibility to protect your family, that as the responsibility ultimately falls to you it is also your decision on how security is to be accomplished and you will do it. Obviously this isn't to say that a wife in general has no say in how family security is accomplished - however, I do believe that if a matter is serious enough and a decision must be made which cannot be agreed upon it would be the man who is the ultimate decider. You may have a different view of how a family should be structured, but, alas, that is my opinion without thinking it through too heavily.
Step three: Carry everywhere, all the time. You must explain that, unfortunately, or not unfortunately, the rules restricting loaded/unloaded time no longer work with the family's security plan and so those rules have been redacted. Reasoning for this is two-fold. First of all, you will be more secure when you carry more often. Secondly, the same methods which are used by open carry advocates to advocate for open carry to the public will likely work just as well to advocate for open (or any) carry in the home. The prime method of advocating for open carry is openly carrying.
Like I said, this is basically (basically basically) what I did. The objections to me carrying are much fewer and far between. Actually, they've pretty much ceased. In fact, my wife is now interested in 1. shooting 2. owning her own firearm and 3. eventually carrying on a regular basis
Step one: Ask her for any reasonable objections she has to you carrying. (There will probably be none. Subsequent steps assume no reasonable objections)
Step two: Be adamant that carrying is important to you, for your family's benefit, that it is your responsibility to protect your family, that as the responsibility ultimately falls to you it is also your decision on how security is to be accomplished and you will do it. Obviously this isn't to say that a wife in general has no say in how family security is accomplished - however, I do believe that if a matter is serious enough and a decision must be made which cannot be agreed upon it would be the man who is the ultimate decider. You may have a different view of how a family should be structured, but, alas, that is my opinion without thinking it through too heavily.
Step three: Carry everywhere, all the time. You must explain that, unfortunately, or not unfortunately, the rules restricting loaded/unloaded time no longer work with the family's security plan and so those rules have been redacted. Reasoning for this is two-fold. First of all, you will be more secure when you carry more often. Secondly, the same methods which are used by open carry advocates to advocate for open carry to the public will likely work just as well to advocate for open (or any) carry in the home. The prime method of advocating for open carry is openly carrying.
Like I said, this is basically (basically basically) what I did. The objections to me carrying are much fewer and far between. Actually, they've pretty much ceased. In fact, my wife is now interested in 1. shooting 2. owning her own firearm and 3. eventually carrying on a regular basis
since9
Campaign Veteran
Guys, and I do mean the males who've responded, you're way over-thinking the issue. That won't work, here.
Try asking your female friends or significant others what they recommend.
Try asking your female friends or significant others what they recommend.
SFCRetired
Regular Member
Guys, and I do mean the males who've responded, you're way over-thinking the issue. That won't work, here.
Try asking your female friends or significant others what they recommend.
Exactly!! That is why I told OP that I wished we lived closer so that our wives could talk. I suspect that if his wife heard my wife's story, she might be a tad more flexible about the subject. And it does need to be a woman-to-woman talk.
Maverick9
Regular Member
I have NEVER left a gun in the car. Do you realize it takes even a casual thief about 20-30 seconds to get into your car. Ask yourself, how would you acquire a firearm if your were barred from possessing it. You could simply go to places that are 'gun free' and take a few minutes to watch for people disarming before going into the store or business.
So here we have a person who is a complete newbie with firearms talking out his hat about going to the aid of strangers and 'helping' LE. To me that's a fantasy-prone personality and close to vigilantism wanting to own a firearm. So YES if I was this person's spouse, knowing that as a newbie he was already fantasizing about inserting himself foolishly into dangerous situations you can BELIEVE I would fight to keep him from having a firearm.
As an observer, I wouldn't be happy with this kind of person carrying, but I answered the question as in the position of his spouse. These kind of ideas (storing the firearm in the car and going to the 'aid' of strangers) are the height of folly. DON'T DO IT. You'll end up in far more trouble than if you just decided to be on the whole more cautious and observant and perhaps gone out and taken some courses from people with a lot more experience and wisdom than the OP is showing here.
WalkingWolf
Regular Member
Watching him overreact here I came to the conclusion that maybe his wife is not a anti, but that she does not trust him with a gun. Between fantasies and going over the deep end so easily I would be apprehensive around such a person.
If that is the case no matter how much indoctrination anyone attempts is not going to change her trust level. We had a girl friend originally from LI a few years back that was very liberal and anti. Yet she never once complained about me being armed, she accepted me and my manners, and commented I made her feel safe. The only time she got upset was not about the gun, but her cousin and I discussing politics.
Mature people do not attempt to control other mature people.
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stealthyeliminator
Regular Member
Going back to read all replies I see I missed quite a bit and that my post was a little late. I do not see any post in which the op 'over reacted' though. Imo the op is pretty straight forward and any criticism toward his marriage is off topic and intrusive.
wrearick
Regular Member
Maverick9
Regular Member
It's not so much an overreaction on the OP's part, it's the 'Oh that's just the way I am' - IOW, inured to any behavior changes when carrying a firearm. It is very understandable that the spouse would be fearful NOT of the weapon but of the OP's injudicious behavior when armed.
Good comment.
Oh thank heavens and praise the saints you are not a moderator out here cuz your panties would be in a snit all the time ruling items off topic and intrusive...
ipse
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WalkingWolf
Regular Member
Above is the post that sent OP over the deep edge to put me on ignore. If anybody finds the above insulting in the least fashion they seriously have the problem, not I.
Only from my personal perspective -
If you love me, really love me you won't tell me not to carry......as I carry because I really love you.
Played to the tune as orginally sung by Kay Starr:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbmHBjr7xLw
davidmcbeth
Banned
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-jAaouaUVW4
Yacky yacky yack .... can't believe things you say .. LOL
(given a seeking of songs to express oneself)
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stealthyeliminator
Regular Member
Doubt it... I never said it should be moderated. Just called it what I think it is
WalkingWolf
Regular Member
:lol::lol::lol:
stealthyeliminator
Regular Member
I guess I don't see what you find funny about that. Care to share?
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