SO the firearm is holsterd and the muzzle is pointed at me...so what. The OP just sitting there enjoying a burrito (BTW--those are just too dang big for me!) will NOT cause the firearm to discharge--even it's a worn out POS. I might ask him what it was out of curiosity, even though I'd probably be able to identify it as a 1911 from just the muzzle view. Wouldn't matter if he had it covered with a jacket--that'd just mean I didn't know it was there in the first place--no functional difference whatsoever. Personal opinion & feelings.
Cooper DID make it clear that the muzzle of a properly holstered (which includes a trigger guard--virtually ALL modern holsters are designed with that in mind, even the minimalist types) weapon is essentially safe to be oriented (not pointed in the sense that it's not in-hand) in any direction. That is, one is not "covering" anyone/anything with it in that circumstance. To argue "what-ifs" about the possibility that he might overly excited and release the safety and pull the trigger while drawing the weapon is rather overzealous. He could just as easily INTEND to release the safety and fire while drawing (gotta clear the trigger guard first...)--you know because he's an unsafe loose cannon. Besides, are you SURE that your belt-holstered weapon absolutely NEVER points at some part of your own body? How about during that oh so dangerous draw (and I'm not being sarcastic here!) or reholstering?
I also understand the OP's reluctance to meet the complainant's in-your-face-ire with the proverbial honey. However difficult it is, the "kinder, gentler" approach in general goes much further in "influencing enemies." On the other hand, I wasn't there, so I can't really say just how I'd have reacted, but his response was at least not as openly hostile as the complainant's--which could have made things ugly and definitely wouldn't help the movement.
All in all, he did OK on my opinion.
The chance of the mentioned firearm going off is irrelevant. No matter how one wants to spin this, the fact remains that the muzzle of a loaded firearm under the OP's control was pointed at man and his wife. There are two things at issue here: respect and basic firearms safety.
I will answer your well thought out points in these contexts. First, safety of the manner of carry. It is true that a verticle holster may point at the body part of the person wearing it. However, that is MY leg or foot that it is pointing at and that is because I CHOSE to wear a holster with the remote possibility that the weapon could go off and injure myself. It does not point at anyone else and maintains the muzzle of my firearm in a safe direction. The people who the original OP exposed to the buisness end of a pistol DID NOT choose to be exposed to that risk. In effect, the OP has chosen to carry in this manner for a "comfort" reason and expose them to risk they did not ask for. If you can go about your daily life and feel comfortable with the loaded weapon pointed at part of your body, awesome! But don't be so shocked when other people are not as happy about having a loaded weapon pointed at them. They do not and should not have to have the buisness end of a weapon pointed at them simply because it's more comfortable for you.
You made a point about drawing. Drawing is not a reasonable comparison to this situation. The only reason I would draw my weapon in public is for the purpose of self-defense, once that situation occurs, all bets are off. You are in survival mode and the removal of the threat takes 1st priority in order to preserve life and limb. But in the peaceful setting of the OP's situation, there is no legitimate reason for the weapon to be pointed at anyone.
You may very well ask yourself? Why are these people so paranoid about muzzle awareness? It's not going to just go off on it's own magicly....
Well, those of us who have worked on a range, been in the military (I would think you especially would know better, but then again I've never been in the Airforce), been a LEO, or other profession that involves working with firearms on a daily basis, many of us HAVE seen weapons that were supposedly safe "magicly" go off and people get killed. It does happen, it can happen, and if Murphy has his way that day, it will happen. These are occurances that you do not forget and...trust me, you never want to see it happen again. So, yes, people tend to get a little emotional when discussing firearms safety because we've watched idiots kill their buddy because the weapon "magicly" went off.
I'm not suprised the man responded the way he did. I do not expect to have a loaded weapon pointed at me and especially not at my family. What if it did go off and kill someone, do you think there's a chance in hell your not gonna get slapped with a negligent homicide charge. I think he totally would have been justified in asking the manager to boot the OP. Bottom line,
Someone pointing a loaded weapon at someone for "comfort" reasons = selfish BLUE FALCON