what is it
we, as adults:
1. continue to allow our parents, siblings, friends, etc., to 'push our buttons'
2. feel the compulsive need to respond when our buttons are pushed.
(which was what the intended response was when they pushed your button in the first place)
kinda like dealing with a police interrogation...keep quiet...
try this the next time they push your button(s) on this subject...do not respond or react!! your distractors will push again - harder...do not respond or react!! they will push even harder to elicit a response...do not give in!!
one of the reasons ppl use this learned method to begin a conversation is that they do not believe they have any other way of initiating a discussion (remember an argument is considered normal conversation in some families) w/you so it is habit and you are 'trained' to respond to this button pushing subject as you believe you need to defend yourself - you don't!!
now on the other side of that...when the pushing didn't elicit a response...please after waiting a moment, 'sincerely' (do not be flippant), aim the conversation to another subject...say sports, weather, health, clothes someone is wearing, etc. using this methodology will soon break the button pushers 'habit' of trying to start conversations using this subject and you will be working on not automatically responding to known button issues.
the button pushers will soon recognize the subject doesn't get a response, they will move on to another 'infamous' button(s) of yours to push...see above actions!!
caveat: parents have a long history of using this technique against their children and olde habits do not die easily, especially w/the female parent...so it might take awhile to break them of using this particular subject to get your goat. trust me they will soon use another one to elicit a response so be prepared...
however, if you take the fun out of their button pushing, they will soon discover that specific button doesn't work and it will get better...honest
wabbit
ps: shades of Lucy...please leave your .05 in the jar by the door...