We were planning to go to Costco this evening. She gets home, and a minute later she says she'll be back in a little bit. Asked where she was going and she said "Costco". I said "I was willing to come with". She says "If you're going to carry that gun, I'm going to go by myself". "Are you sure you don't want me to come with?" I asked. "If you'll at least leave it in the car" she replies. "Cuz nothing could happen in the store, right?" There was more to the conversation/argument from there, but that's the gist of it.
This isn't the first time it's come up. First, she had been very resistant to me even getting the gun. I finally saved up the money over several months to afford it rather than dumping a chunk all at once. Then she wanted to set rules about when it should be out or loaded. I accepted them. Then she showed opposition to me getting a concealed carry permit. I'd been telling her for years that I wanted to get one, and gave her my reasons. Then I decided to open carry until I get my permit, since it's perfectly legal here. The first couple times I wore it out, she didn't even notice. Then when she finally did, she started to grouse about it. And now we've gotten to the point where this evening's situation happened.
So I'm trying to figure out how to handle this. I obviously don't want to completely piss my wife off, but I also feel strongly about my right to protect myself and those I care about, especially in today's age of random public mass shootings. She doesn't seem to understand that. I don't know if she thinks I'm trying to be some vigilante or something (which I'm not), but she seems to feel that my wanting to carry is irrational. She makes the point that we live in a safer city now, which we do (lived in Salinas, CA for years where gangs are terrible and crime is high; now live in Eugene, OR where crime is less and gangs are almost non-existent). I point out that the mall shooting a couple years back in Portland was a pretty safe place, not to mention Sandy Hook.
I just don't know what to say. I've tried "I hope you'll trust me to be responsible with it", that "just because we've never been the victim of violent crime thus far doesn't mean we never will be", the tried-and-true "I'd rather have it and never need it than need it and not have it", that "crime happens everywhere, not just in bad areas". I can't tell her that I wouldn't go to someone else's aid if a shooting started but we were safe, because I AM the kind of person that would try to help others.
How do you all think I should proceed?
